First off, Melinda Clarke is not married to Malcolm McDowell, or to the agent he was playing tonight. Which is a good thing, since we love Julie Cooper and hate that guy. Trying to steal Vince from Ari like that, and at the little Gold girl's bat mitzvah, no less! Of course, it's not like anyone on the guest list was on their best behavior. Don't these people know that the Beverly Hilton is a castle of class? Except when the annual Television Critics Association tour hits town, but that's a whole other column. Anyhoo, I have to say Mandy Moore's dropping that shocker about her broken engagement threw me as much as it did Vinnie, and probably for the same reasons. No good can come from these two getting back together; it totally kills our chances of Andy Roddick's making a cameo and really, the world only needs one Gigli. If that. Then again, James Cameron did turn Titanic into an Oscar winner despite that awful script and stroke-inducing Celine Dion song, so maybe Aquaman will be OK. But I would have Leo on speed dial just in case.
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