Friends Joey finally gets to display the acting chops that keep him on Days of Our Lives when he hilariously talks himself out of a corner during a run-in with Chandler and Monica's adoption agent (

Maria Patillo), a young woman he never called after a date. Although she is probably known for her role on Providence, I remember Patillo from the late great Partners, which starred current comeback kids Jon Cryer (Two and a Half Men) and Tate Donovan (The O.C.).

Threat Matrix Something about Russian operatives, American double agents and contagion-carrying currency. Maybe it's a plug for the new $20 bills.

Old Navy Commercial Lil' Kim is their new spokesmodel? Because sometimes it's just too damn cold for only pasties and a G-string.

Survivor: Pearl Islands I still have not tired of seeing Rupert repeatedly win challenges. Too bad we all know those whiny Balboa brats are going to give our husky hero the heave-ho before he can claim his rightful reward. I could be off-base, but did anyone else think Trishelle when they first saw Darrah? I don't know who has the more grating voice: Darrah or Janice Muppet twin Christa.

Will & Grace The series scrapes the bottom of the guest-star barrel as Jack Black makes urine and marijuana references while playing Karen's oddball doctor. Why? I think his School of Rock is still doing well at the box office, but let's not overlook the fact that his girlfriend is Laura Kightlinger, a consulting producer. And was that silly hat Debra Messing held over her belly really necessary? If the audience can accept that heterosexual Eric McCormack can play gay Will Truman, surely they can digest that only the actress is pregnant, not her character.

Scrubs Tara Reid guest stars as Jordan's sister and J.D.'s new love interest. While a TV stint could be a wise career move for Reid, why would a hot chick like her be attracted to a doofus like J.D.? I'm sure if she's anything like his former flames (Sarah Chalke's Elliot and Amy Smart's coma wife), her character undoubtedly has issues. At least Six Feet Under's Freddy Rodriguez got to have some fun playing Carla's brother, who has it in for future-brother-in-law Turk.

Primetime Thursday Diane Sawyer interviews pop tart Britney Spears. And I tuned in eager to loathe her. For a while she annoyed me, with her big brown doe eyes and the incontinuity of her lipgloss. But halfway through the Q&A, when Sawyer referenced the tough year she'd had, Brit cried. And I saw a side of her I hadn't seen before: the 21-year-old who actually lives under those layers of makeup and centimeters of fabric. She bites her nails and cracks her knuckles. She says "like" and "um" and "eew" a lot. She's embarrassed by her crush on Brad Pitt. Her facial expressions reminded me of Katie Holmes on Dawson's Creek, and she seems to think that squinting at Sawyer while fielding questions about her personal life will make her seem credible. But it was those seemingly sincere tears that got me. (I doubt she was acting; I saw Crossroads.) Real or not, they made me remember being 21, when it wasn't always easy figuring out who I wanted to be, not to mention dealing with the humiliations of failed young love. I can't imagine how overwhelming it must be to do all that in front of the whole world. In a thong.

And the quote of the night, courtesy of the Daily Show's Jon Stewart during his interview with Looney Tunes: Back in Action star Brendan Fraser: "Do you not have an agent anymore?"