Wendi McLendon-Covey Wendi McLendon-Covey

Season 2 of The Goldbergs is seven long days away, but we've got something to tide you over: Beverly's (Wendi McLendon-Covey) most tragic parenting tales.

Fall TV: Scoop on your favorite returning shows

Who else is better at — attempting to — scare off her kids from doing, well, anything with ridiculous, bizarre tales of woe? Have we figured out what a "terror stroke" is yet? Or how you can lose 2 inches from doing The Worm? (Seriously, what will she come up with next season?)Check out the clip below.

The Goldbergs: Beverly's best smother moments

The Goldbergs returns Wednesday, Sept. 24 at 8:30/7:30c on ABC.