What's Your Number?

If What’s Your Number? was any more cookie-cutter, it would have been produced by Toll House. The only feasible reason to watch it would be to play a drinking game of spotting romantic-comedy clichés, but it wouldn’t be any fun because everyone would be passed out in pools of their own vomit by the time the predictable happy ending came along, and...read more

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Reviewed by Jason Buchanan
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If What’s Your Number? was any more cookie-cutter, it would have been produced by Toll House. The only feasible reason to watch it would be to play a drinking game of spotting romantic-comedy clichés, but it wouldn’t be any fun because everyone would be passed out in pools of their own vomit by the time the predictable happy ending came along, and no one would be sober enough to drive you to the hospital after you got alcohol poisoning. So odds are you’d die to the sound of Anna Faris and Chris Evans giggling to themselves about how adorable it is that they somehow avoided contracting syphilis after sleeping with nearly everyone in town in an attempt to find that special someone who wouldn’t run out of their bedrooms in horror after noticing all of the notches on their bedposts. If the bedpost is still standing, that is, because with all of the carving going on it likely toppled like a pristine oak in a logging camp years prior.

Upon reading a magazine article stating that most women who sleep with more than 20 men never get married, Ally Darling (Faris) begins to fear that one of her many ex-boyfriends may have been "the one that got away." Ally has had her fair share of men. Nineteen to be exact, and with the big 20 right around the corner, she fears that she’ll live the rest of her life alone -- a feeling compounded as her sister Daisy (Ari Graynor) gets engaged to the perfect man. With Daisy’s wedding fast approaching, Ally vows that the next man she sleeps with will be her husband. Ally’s neighbor Colin (Evans), the son of a former detective, never met a one-night-stand he could actually stand, and he agrees to help Ally track down all 19 of her exes in exchange for using her apartment to hide out from his conquests once the morning arrives and they’re no longer of any use to him. But as Ally tries to reel in the man of her dreams, she remains blind to the fact that he’s been standing right beside her from the very beginning.

What’s Your Number? is shot with the creative eye of a one-season sitcom, and written with about the same level of creativity and innovation. The characters are boring stereotypes, the situations are contrived, and the entire plot can be accurately predicted by watching the trailer. Characters change personalities in the blink of an eye simply to service the “plot,” and the only one who shows even a shred of personality or likability is Ally’s free-spirited father, played by Ed Begley Jr. Joel McHale does manage to get a few laughs as Ally’s finger-sniffing boss, yet even Andy Samberg does a face-plant with a cameo that may have sounded funny on paper, but flatlines on film.

The whole thing seems to exist as a means of comforting those who can’t keep their sexual impulses in check, and convincing them that there will always be someone more slutty and less judgmental there for you once your brain finally manages to gain control over your libido. If What’s Your Number? was actually funny, perhaps this point could be taken in stride and laughed off as a playful jab at our sex-obsessed culture. Instead, it just feels kind of gross. And it’s a shame, too, because as one of the most-talented comic actresses of her generation, Anna Faris deserves better than this.

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  • Released: 2011
  • Rating: R
  • Review: If What’s Your Number? was any more cookie-cutter, it would have been produced by Toll House. The only feasible reason to watch it would be to play a drinking game of spotting romantic-comedy clichés, but it wouldn’t be any fun because everyone would be p… (more)

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