Two and a Half Men Episodes

2003, TV Show

Two and a Half Men Season 1 episodes

Can You Feel My Finger? Season 1, Episode 24

Charlie has a pregnancy scare involving one of his one-night stands and decides to go for the big “V,” and we're not talking Vegas. Dr. Sperlock: Terry Rhoads. Naomi: Jenna Gering. Paul: Byrne Offutt. Berta: Conchata Ferrell. read more

Just Like Buffalo Season 1, Episode 23

When Jake repeats one of Charlie's sexist remarks in front of Judith's support group, the women convince Judith to stop Jake's visits with his dad and Charlie. Linda: Romy Rosemont. Ruth: Cheryl White. Kathleen: Amy Farrington. Mandy: Yvette Nicole Brown. read more

My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet Season 1, Episode 22

When Charlie discovers that Alan is sleepwalking, he believes it's related to his brother's lack of sex following his divorce, and comes up with a cure. Dr. Linda Freeman: Jane Lynch. Darlene: Amanda Swisten. Annette: Jamie Day. read more

No Sniffing, No Wowing Season 1, Episode 21

Charlie plays a tricky game when he gets involved with Alan's divorce lawyer (Heather Locklear), who could make things difficult for Alan if she were, say, dumped by a self-centered lothario. Crystal: Alana De La Garza. Stuart: Marc Grapey. read more

Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark? Season 1, Episode 20

Jake's sullen mood baffles and bothers the family and prompts Alan and Judith to take him to a child psychologist (Jane Lynch). Vicki: Amanda Tosch. Jake: Angus T. Jones. Berta: Conchata Ferrell. Judith: Marin Hinkle. read more

I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You Season 1, Episode 19

Judith's devious siren sister (Teri Hatcher) stirs things up at Jake's 11th birthday party when she hits on Alan. Meanwhile, Evelyn brings alcohol and has a party of her own. Judith: Marin Hinkle. Evelyn: Holland Taylor. Rose: Melanie Lynskey. read more

An Old Flame With a New Wick Season 1, Episode 18

Chris O'Donnell plays one of Charlie's ex-girlfriends, who is now a man. It gets better: He starts dating Evelyn (Holland Taylor), who's clueless about his past history with her son. Leanne: Rebecca McFarland. Berta: Conchata Ferrel. read more

Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats Season 1, Episode 17

Charlie's still brooding over Alan's choice of their cousin as Jake's guardian if both parents die when the boy has an accident while in his care and has to be rushed to the hospital. Dr. Prajneep: Kris Iyer. Nurse: Vernee Watson Johnson. Gonzales: Ski Carr. read more

That Was Saliva, Alan Season 1, Episode 16

Charlie is perplexed when Frankie (Jenna Elfman), the mysterious woman temporarily living in the Harper household, begins falling for Alan and not him. Judith: Marin Hinkle. read more

Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick Season 1, Episode 15

Jenna Elfman plays a mysterious, slightly crazed woman whom Charlie invites to stay at the house until she can settle some family problems. Alan: Jon Cryer. Charlie: Charlie Sheen. Jake: Angus T. Jones. read more

I Can't Afford Hyenas Season 1, Episode 14

Charlie's financial manager (Richard Lewis) informs the carefree jingle writer that he spends money faster than his royalty checks come in, and now he must go on a budget. Susan: Elena Lyons. Ted: J.D. Walsh. read more

Sarah Like Puny Alan Season 1, Episode 13

Charlie nurses an ailing Alan back to health so they can go on a double date with two sisters, one of whom Charlie's been wanting to date for a long time. Desiree: Johanna Black. Kathy: Lori Lively. Rose: Melanie Lynskey. read more

Camel Filters and Pheromones Season 1, Episode 12

Berta's granddaughter (Megan Fox) spends the day at Charlie's, which isn't a problem until he learns she's a beautiful, rebellious 16-year-old. Freddie: Noel Fisher. Berta: Conchata Ferrell. Rose: Melanie Lynskey. Judith: Marin Hinkle. read more

Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor Season 1, Episode 11

When Alan is surprised to see that Judith has had a makeover and is dating a man, he decides to have Charlie help him transform his image. Alan: Jon Cryer. Jake: Angus T.Jones. Judith: Marin Hinkle. Charlie: Charlie Sheen. read more

Merry Thanksgiving Season 1, Episode 10

Denise Richards plays Charlie's engaged old love. Realizing he's losing someone special, Charlie plans a Thanksgiving dinner to convince her he's a family guy and that she should be with him. Sheldon: George Wyner. Lenore: Christine Rose. read more

Phase One, Complete Season 1, Episode 9

Charlie is convinced that a woman (Myndy Crist) who spent the night with him wants to turn their relationship into something serious after she befriends Jake and Evelyn. Dave: Christopher Jacobs. Evelyn: Holland Taylor. read more

Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-ful Season 1, Episode 8

Alan tricks Charlie into joining him and Judith in leading Jake and his classmates in the school's annual music show. Ms. Tuttle: Deena Dill. Brianna: Abigail Mavity. Katie: Katelin Peterson. Luis: Jacob Urrutia. Judith: Main Hinkle. read more

If They Do Go Either Way They're Usually Fake Season 1, Episode 7

Judith is upset with Alan and Charlie when she learns that a surfer (Kristin Datillo) who uses Charlie's shower walks around half naked in front of Jake . Then Alan's worried when Judith and the surfer become friends. Judith: Marin Hinkle. Jake: Angus T. Jones. Alan: Jon Cryer. read more

Did You Check With the Captain of the Flying Monkeys? Season 1, Episode 6

The guys go to Evelyn's house to meet the new man she's dating, and Charlie realizes the man's daughter (Krista Allen) is a woman he's trying to avoid. Tommy: Madison Mason. Evelyn: Holland Taylor. Charlie: Charlie Sheen. read more

The Last Thing You Want to Do Is Wind Up With a Hump Season 1, Episode 5

Alan and Charlie have encounters with some highly libidinous soccer moms, but with two very different outcomes. Kate: Liz Vassey. Gloria: Christine Dunford. Brooke: Tricia O'Kelley. Bill: Eric Allan Kramer. Alan: Jon Cryer. read more

If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap Season 1, Episode 4

Charlie can't function when his housekeeper (Conchata Ferrell) storms off because of Alan's constant complaints, so Alan tries desperately to woo her back. Meanwhile, Rose comes to Charlie for dating advice. Rose: Melanie Lynskey. Jake: Angus T. Jones. read more

Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell Season 1, Episode 3

Jake wants to go home to his mom after he gets sick, prompting Alan to think he's a failure as a husband and now as a father. Cab Driver: Darryl Sivad. Rose: Melanie Lynskey. Evelyn: Holland Taylor. Jake: Angus T. Jones. read more

Big Flappy Bastards Season 1, Episode 2

Despite warnings from Charlie, Jake continues to feed seagulls on the deck and the birds invade the house. Meanwhile, Charlie thinks Judith is taking advantage of Alan, who keeps going to her house to fix things. Jake: Angus T. Jones. Judith: Marin Hinkle. Alan: Jon Cryer. Charlie: Charlie Sheen. read more

Pilot Episode Season 1, Episode 1

Carefree jingle writer Charlie Harper (Charlie Sheen) has his lifestyle altered when his uptight brother and his 10-year-old nephew (Jon Cryer, Angus T. Jones) move in with him. Evelyn Harper: Holland Taylor. Judith Harper: Marin Hinkle. Rose: Melanie Lynskey. read more

Are You Watching?

Loading ...
Premiered: September 22, 2003, on CBS
Rating: TV-PG
User Rating: (1,516 ratings)
Add Your Rating: 1 stars2 stars3 stars4 stars5 stars
Premise: A hit sitcom built on often-raunchy material, starring Charlie Sheen and, later, Ashton Kutcher begins with the premise of a Malibu bachelor (Sheen) whose life is disrupted when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move in with him. In the ninth season, Kutcher replaces Sheen, playing a billionaire with a broken heart. Briskly written and performed, the sitcom had fun spoofing Charlie Sheen's bad-boy reputation (which ultimately led to his exit from the series) and Jon Cryer's nervous energy.

Cast

Shop

Two and a Half Men: Season 9
Buy Two and a Half Men: Season 9 from Amazon.com
From Warner Home Video (DVD)
Usually ships in 24 hours
Buy New: $14.98 (as of 09/15/14 8:15 PM EST - more info)
Two and a Half Men: Season 3
Buy Two and a Half Men: Season 3 from Amazon.com
From Warner Home Video (DVD)
Usually ships in 7 to 12 days
Buy New: $14.99 (as of 09/15/14 8:15 PM EST - more info)

More Products

TV GUIDE Users' Most Popular