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Jim and Tracy welcome Chris Morgan, the kindergartener who wrote the latest action-packed "Fast And The Furious" sequel.

Ohio police have been inundated with false sightings of college-age girls with dyed blond hair, Ugg boots, purple nail polish, and oversized sunglasses.

If you know an idiot, please make sure they're safe and not standing naked in a snow embankment on a dare. 

President Obama's proposed high-speed train system will be replaced with a fleet of buses that will rocket along highways at speeds up to 165 mph.

Oprah's biggest fans will be entombed alongside her in The Oprahmidion where they will bask in her wisdom for eternity.

In the Daily Briefing, NASA scientists ask the Russians to please stop using the ISS as a personal porn studio and a Taliban attack on U.S. forces has led officials to announce they are 'so glad pretty soon America won't have to deal with this shit anymore'.

Pennington, IL's only African-American family moves to the other side of town, causing residents to reminisce about the "Black part of town."

Hockey officials hope to attract fans and create a higher-scoring, fast-paced game with a new aerodynamic puck and artificial turf instead of ice.

Girlfriends' spokesperson Kelly Ambrose joins us in the Financial Fallout Shelter to discuss why Boyfriends moving in with them just makes fiscal sense right now.

Host becomes curiously pushy, sweaty in this roundtable discussion about loopholes in manslaughter law in the US.

Rep. Iscoe warns gays will give penises to lesbians who will give them vaginas so that homosexuals can marry and continue their attack on the American family.

The President says the purpose of the performance reviews is to have a little face time to make sure we're all on the same page going forward.

Boxing officials are hoping the once in a lifetime chance to see Holyfield try to take down thoroughbred Evening Dream will reignite interest in professional boxing.

Business Week ranked the airport last in customer satisfaction due to long delays, bureaucratic employees, and overall oppressive atmosphere

11 year old Thomas Demming visits Today NOW! with the magical friend he hid for weeks in his bedroom closet.