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"Lodge Brother Johnny" Johnny finds out Pops and Carl are members of the highly- secret "Brotherhood of the Gnu" and agrees to undergo the secret initiation process to join, which includes eating only one potato chip and listening to Brother Ernie's long boring story about buying a couch. Johnny's so happy to be let into the secret organization that he alerts the media. "Chain Gang Johnny" After being arrested in a case of mistaken identity, Johnny and Carl are shackled to each other and sent to a maximum-security prison operated by a sexy but tyrannical lady-warden. Posing as an old married couple, they escape into the surrounding marshland and proceed to get on each other's nerves a lot. "Lumberjack Johnny" Johnny joins a lumberjack contest so he can get the "winner’s kiss" from the Lumberjack Queen. Through sheer dumb luck, Johnny continuously beats his giant, flannel-loving competition, only to find out that the beautiful young woman he thought was the Queen is actually the Princess, and from the looks of her mom, she was probably adopted.
"I Dream of Johnny" Johnny buys a dusty old bottle at an Arabian Bazaar, and is pleased to find that it houses a sexy genie who's obliged to grant him three wishes. Careless with the wording of his wishes, Johnny ends up being operated on by a monkey scientist, having a wife and kids that look and act like him, and finally ends up in the bottle himself, only to be discovered by Carl. "One Angry Bravo" When a department store tells an overly boisterous Johnny that he'll "see him in court," Johnny excitedly heads over to the local courthouse to give him his Christmas list. There, he mistakenly gets jury duty on a simple traffic case and ties up the deliberation process for eight months, only voting guilty after the judge threatens to remove the Ski Bunny Channel from his hotel room. "Carnival of the Darned" Johnny runs away from home and joins a traveling circus of freaks and misfits. He quickly finds a niche among them when it becomes clear that he can fall on his head from great heights without hurting himself, but his rise to fame only incites the jealousy of The Bearded Man, who plots his demise. Luckily for Johnny, Mama is in the audience to save his life and take him back to his real family.
"Jurassic Dork" Johnny mistakes the Museum of Natural History for a really big hobby shop, and comes home with a dinosaur egg that he thinks is an airplane model kit. (Johnny's dumb.) When it hatches, Johnny has a screeching, acid-spitting dinosaur on his hands. "Mascot Academy" In an effort to meet cheerleaders, Johnny matriculates at mascot college, where he mistakenly injures Kent Stevens, the college's arrogant star pupil. Months later, Johnny's enjoying his career as a professional mascot - playing a rotting fish head for a football team in Argentina - when Kent tracks him down to seek his revenge. "Full Metal Johnny" Thinking he's signing up for Fantasy Dodgeball Camp, Johnny accidentally joins the U.S. Army, and must endure bootcamp under the tutelage of the beautiful but tough-as-nails Sargeant Trixie. Or, rather, bootcamp must endure Johnny.
"Dental Hijinks" Mama takes Johnny to a dental college to get his toothache fixed for free, but tells him it's the "Happy Fun Park" so he'll come along quietly. When the dentist straps Johnny down to drill his tooth, Johnny deduces he's a "mad change guy" and spends the rest of the episode running around the "park" trying to escape him. "Little Red Riding Johnny" Johnny needs 57 labels of Krelman's Prune Spread to win a pair of Squint Ringo Tungsten Knuckles, and Suzy happens to be bringing 57 jars of the stuff to her Grandma in the woods. When his attempts to steal Suzy's basket fail repeatedly, Johnny resorts to dressing up as Suzy's grandma in the hopes that she'll just hand it over to him. "Pouch Potato" Johnny's booted off the bus tour of a Wild Australia theme park and lands in the kangaroo habitat, where he's adopted by a mama 'roo. Try as he might to fit in, Johnny's an outcast from the rest of the herd until he successfully defends them against the infamous kangaroo poacher, Boomerang Caine.
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- Premiered: March 26, 1995
- Rating: TV-Y7
- Premise: Absurdist animation about a muscle-bound narcissist who thinks he's God's gift to women, when in reality his distaff admirers consist of his mother and the little girl who lives next door. This buff blond with a voice like Elvis but little in the brains de… (more)