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"The Hansel and Gretel Witch Project" Suzy and Carl enlist Johnny to help them make their video documentary on the Hansel and Gretel Witch, who lives in a forest on the outskirts of town. After the three of them are captured by the witch and stuffed full of cake and pie, Carl and Suzy escape. Johnny stays, enjoying the witch's way with a dessert. "I.Q. Johnny" Fired by his boss for wasting his time inventing a smart drink that makes chimps intelligent, a young research scientist sells the potion to Johnny for dollar. Johnny's resulting genius comes in handy when the town's nuclear plant goes into meltdown. But will the drink wear off before he averts nuclear disaster? "Get Stinky" Johnny's childhood nemesis Stinky Brownstein has moved back to town and Johnny's sickened. Blind to the fact that she's now a beautiful woman who's actually interested in him, Johnny thinks of Stinky as the red-headed neighbor girl who used to torment him with practical jokes, and vows his revenge.
"Lodge Brother Johnny" Johnny finds out Pops and Carl are members of the highly- secret "Brotherhood of the Gnu" and agrees to undergo the secret initiation process to join, which includes eating only one potato chip and listening to Brother Ernie's long boring story about buying a couch. Johnny's so happy to be let into the secret organization that he alerts the media. "Chain Gang Johnny" After being arrested in a case of mistaken identity, Johnny and Carl are shackled to each other and sent to a maximum-security prison operated by a sexy but tyrannical lady-warden. Posing as an old married couple, they escape into the surrounding marshland and proceed to get on each other's nerves a lot. "Lumberjack Johnny" Johnny joins a lumberjack contest so he can get the "winner’s kiss" from the Lumberjack Queen. Through sheer dumb luck, Johnny continuously beats his giant, flannel-loving competition, only to find out that the beautiful young woman he thought was the Queen is actually the Princess, and from the looks of her mom, she was probably adopted.
"The Great Bunny Book Ban" Suzy's favorite children's book, "Harold and the Fuzzy Bunny" is banned by the town's richest citizen, Festus Blowhard, so she gets her fellow students to stage a protest by bribing them with brownies. When this fails, Suzy uses every trick at her disposal to make him listen to the story, and wins the day for freedom of speech. "Enter the Chipmunk" Johnny gets a chipmunk down his shirt at a karate meet and ends up leveling everything in his path, impressing his karate teacher's rival, The Amber Claw, who kidnaps Johnny in the hopes of forcing him to reveal the secret of his technique. Unable to recreate his moves, Johnny is about to be made into black belt soup when his friend the chipmunk makes a fortuitous appearance. "Frankenbravo" Johnny appears at Dr. Frankenstein's castle to get back his kite, and is soon convinced to give up his brain in exchange for the hand of the new "bride" the doctor has been working on. She finds Johnny hideous and runs towards town. Johnny saves her from an angry mob, only to find she makes quite the nagging shrew-wife.
"Jurassic Dork" Johnny mistakes the Museum of Natural History for a really big hobby shop, and comes home with a dinosaur egg that he thinks is an airplane model kit. (Johnny's dumb.) When it hatches, Johnny has a screeching, acid-spitting dinosaur on his hands. "Mascot Academy" In an effort to meet cheerleaders, Johnny matriculates at mascot college, where he mistakenly injures Kent Stevens, the college's arrogant star pupil. Months later, Johnny's enjoying his career as a professional mascot - playing a rotting fish head for a football team in Argentina - when Kent tracks him down to seek his revenge. "Full Metal Johnny" Thinking he's signing up for Fantasy Dodgeball Camp, Johnny accidentally joins the U.S. Army, and must endure bootcamp under the tutelage of the beautiful but tough-as-nails Sargeant Trixie. Or, rather, bootcamp must endure Johnny.
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- Premiered: March 26, 1995
- Rating: TV-Y7
- Premise: Absurdist animation about a muscle-bound narcissist who thinks he's God's gift to women, when in reality his distaff admirers consist of his mother and the little girl who lives next door. This buff blond with a voice like Elvis but little in the brains de… (more)