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Desperate Housewives Episode Recap: "Everybody Says Don't/If It's Only in Your Head"

We're finally here, folks! It's the two-hour season finale of Desperate Housewives, which is technically two self-contained, one-hour episodes — so I've recapped them separately. Bree and Orson's divorce battle heats up fo' realz, with Karl on the scene stoking the fire with devilish glee. Gaby and Carlos inherit an unruly teenager. Lynette receives some life-changing news from the doctor, just as Tom's midlife crisis pops up again. Plus, Lily Tomlin is back to help the idiot cops connect the dots of Dave Williams' murderous plan for revenge, which finally kicks into gear. Its resolution is somewhat surprising, in that its aftermath prompts further revelations that set up interesting developments for Season 6. Read on to find out how it all went down...

 read full recap
Recent Comments
  • I HOPE JACKSON RETURNS!  I WATCHED BECAUSE OF HIM!
  • I really liked Zac and his character, he was unlike most sitcom teens and we could see him evolve to become someone people actually respect. Maybe one or two of the HW  will...
  • Mike with Susan, Mike with Katherine, Mike with Edie, on and on and on.  I could care less.  They are all boring at this point except for Edie of course.  She was never...

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  • Mega Buzz on 24, CSI: NY, 90210, Lost, NCIS, Fringe & More | Today's News: Our Take | 6/30/2009 New

    Every week, senior editors Matt Webb Mitovich, Mickey O'Connor and Tim Molloy satisfy your need for TV scoop. Please send all questions to mega_scoop@tvguide.com

    Will Kim Raver return to 24 since ABC didn't pick up her new show? — BrightEyez
    MATT: I see where you're going with this. Since Season 8 is set in New York City, you're hoping Jack and Audrey will rendezvous, Sleepless in Seattle-style, atop the Empire State Building. Well, put a pin in that dream for now. For starters, you should be with me in wanting Jack with Renee, not Audrey. Beyond that, ABC's Inside the Box pilot is undergoing retooling/technically still in play, so Raver might not exactly be available. But one Kim you can plan on returning is Jack's daughter — sources tell me Elisha Cuthbert has already filmed scenes for Day 8's first few hours.

    What can you tell us about CSI: NY's decision to hire a new CSI? — Karla
    TIM: The show recently sent out casting notices for the new series regular role of Kaye Sullivan, a young, attractive ... read more 56 Comments

  • Contract Hit: Drea de Matteo Joins Desperate Housewives | Today's News: Our Take | 6/29/2009

    Sopranos alumna Drea de Matteo is joining Desperate Housewives this season, and she's bringing a small mob of her own with her — in the form of a husband and a son.

    De Matteo has been cast in a series regular role, an ABC rep confirms, ostensibly offsetting the loss of Nicollette Sheridan's Edie, who perished toward the end of Season 5. De Matteo's Bronx-bred Wisteria Lane newcomer arrives in town with a husband and 19-year-old son in tow.

    Mega Buzz answers your questions about Housewives and more

    Based on the arrival script for de Matteo's character, she's ... read more 19 Comments

  • Mega Buzz on Grey's, Housewives, CSI: Miami, Tree Hill and More! | Today's News: Our Take | 6/23/2009

    Every week, senior editors Matt Webb Mitovich, Mickey O'Connor and Tim Molloy satisfy your need for TV scoop. Please send all questions to mega_scoop@tvguide.com.

    Color me shocked that Katherine Heigl isn't leaving Grey's Anatomy. Is it possible we're being duped in some way? — Krista
    MATT: I must say that the lack of fanfare surrounding ABC's confirmation of Heigl's status — especially when juxtaposed with the flurry of official statements regarding T.R. Knight's departure — made me raise one of my overgrown eyebrows. "Sure, she's staying... for just one more episode," I cynically hypothesized. But one of my best sources insists that this is not a case of clever semantics, and that Heigl's Izzie will have a significant presence in the fall. 

    Please give me some scoop on what's next for Desperate Housewives' Bree.  — Fernando R.
    MICKEY: Bree may come off like a brittle maneater, but at heart she's a real softy, which is why juggling an angry Orson and a horny Karl will really ... read more 30 Comments

  • Mega Buzz on NCIS, Housewives, The Beast, Smallville and More! | Today's News: Our Take | 6/16/2009

    Every week, senior editors Matt Webb Mitovich, Mickey O'Connor and Tim Molloy satisfy your need for TV scoop. Please send all questions to mega_scoop@tvguide.com.

    I only have one question about the NCIS finale: Is Cote de Pablo returning to the show next season? — B.C.
    MATT: Why, did it look like Ziva was on death's doorstep in that secretly filmed torture scene? If so, think back to what NCIS boss Shane Brennan said about that grim cliff-hanger: Come September, "all will be revealed and you will be surprised. It will come at you from left field." (But, in a word: Yes. Sources whisper to me that Cote will be back.) Bonus buzzlet: Season 6 arrives on DVD Aug. 25! 

    Please tell us the rumors aren't true, and that Desperate Housewives isn't going with a melodramatic miscarriage storyline for Lynette. — Steph
    MICKEY: Egads, this is morbid, Steph, but let's retrace our steps: Marc Cherry has said that he thinks a mother losing a child would be ... read more 48 Comments

  • Desperate Housewives Episode Recap: "Everybody Says Don't/If It's Only in Your Head" | TV Show Recaps | 5/15/2009

    We're finally here, folks! It's the two-hour season finale of Desperate Housewives, which is technically two self-contained, one-hour episodes — so I've recapped them separately. Bree and Orson's divorce battle heats up fo' realz, with Karl on the scene stoking the fire with devilish glee. Gaby and Carlos inherit an unruly teenager. Lynette receives some life-changing news from the doctor, just as Tom's midlife crisis pops up again. Plus, Lily Tomlin is back to help the idiot cops connect the dots of Dave Williams' murderous plan for revenge, which finally kicks into gear. Its resolution is somewhat surprising, in that its aftermath prompts further revelations that set up interesting developments for Season 6. Read on to find out how it all went down...

    read more 95 Comments

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Premiered: October 03, 2004, on ABC
Rating: TV-PG
User Rating: (638 ratings)
Add Your Rating: 1 stars2 stars3 stars4 stars5 stars
Premise: Following her suicide, Mary Alice Young keeps tabs on friends and family she left behind on bucolic suburban Wisteria Lane. But this being a prime-time soap (if a tongue-in-cheek one), they all harbor a sordid secret or two. Created by writer-producer Marc Cherry (a 'Golden Girls' alum), 'Housewives' was an instant hit and has been a frequent contender on Emmy night ever since.

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