OK, so is it just me, or are the auditions just dragging on
eternally at this point? I mean, I've always enjoyed them.... but now I'm ready for the real singing to start. Alas, next Tuesday's episode will mean yet another location for
American Idol, Atlanta this time. Hopefully the auditions won't be too painful and Hollywood week will make it all worthwhile.
I did kind of like the
Miami Vice music and opening credits - though I'm not sure who Ryan thought he was channeling in those sunglasses (Don Johnson circa 1984 he is not). He wasn't the only one sporting some odd duds: The first day,
Randy was wearing some blindingly shiny red-patent shoes, which may have actually been topped on the second day by his equally shiny purple embroidered shirt. And
Paula was seriously busting out of her clothes. Must've been
awfully hot in Miami for her to wear so little out in public (much less on camera). Even Simon commented on it: "That's a very short dress, Paula, very slutty."
Has anyone else noticed that Randy and
Simon are seeming very buddy-buddy this season? It's kind of cute. Simon may not exactly be mellowing in his old age, but he's at least being a little nicer to his fellow judges.
Anyway, on to the auditions! I'd like to start with a general insight: Anyone who comes in trying to sing Janis Joplin is probably in for a rude awakening. Witness Shannon McCough, who works at her parents' meat market and exhibits an astonishing (if not exactly "impressive") belching ability. Her "Cry Baby" was positively cringe-inducing. Or, as Randy summed it up, "It sounds like you're eating when you're singing." Even better was Simon's comment: "That was like the Hungarian Janis Joplin." When Shannon asked, "Can I sing something else for you?" Simon responded emphatically, "
Never." Perhaps even more astounding was Julie Dubela, the former
American Juniors finalist, whose "Me and Bobby McGee" was pretty lackluster, but nothing compared to her persona and appearance. That must have been seriously the roughest-looking 16 I've ever seen. Not only has she apparently aged exponentially in the past four years, but she sounded a
lot better at age 12. I shudder to think what she'll be like at 20!
Other less-than-sizzling Miami auditioners:
Ben Hausbach, who sang "Crocodile Rock" - this may seem odd, but Ben sort of reminded me of a completely creeped-out Lyle Lovett. Minus the vocal ability.
Carroy Bethea, who sang "Chain of Fools" - Carroy was all screech and hair. When he sang, "My doctor said take it easy," I thought, Yes indeedy. If he keeps that caterwauling up, he's liable to rupture something.
Richard Valles, who sang "God Bless the Broken Road" - he seemed so serious and intent, I sort of felt bad for the guy, but honestly, what
was that? I mean, there's having a nasal sound and then there's literally singing out of your nose.
Brandon Black, who sang "I'll Make Love to You" - his "comedy" routine left nearly as much to be desired as his singing, which also involved stripping off parts of his all-white outfit and doing some kind of scary hip-thrust thing.
And some of the folks who made it through:
Robbie Carrico, who sang "Simple Kind of Man" - the former boy-bander with the long hair and the knit cap just barely made it past the judges, but I thought he sounded pretty darn good. Plus, if he hadn't gotten his golden ticket, his family would have been denied covering him with silly string, which would have been a bummer for all of us.
Ghaleb Emachah, who sang "I'm Not Afraid to Love" - I'm not sure that the guitar-playing Venezuelan with the big smile deserved to make it through, but he did inspire Simon's best odd comment of the night (see below).
Corliss Smith, who sang "Take 5" - Corliss was one half of the memorable best-friend team, and she was hot for Randy, who seemed to eat it up. She was accompanied by...
Brittany Wescott, who sang "My Guy" - Brittany was in love with
Ryan but didn't have too much trouble switching her affections to Simon. Both girls were rewarded with golden tickets, and their joy meant that everyone got kisses.
Ramiele Malubay, who sang "Natural Woman" - I thought it was sort of condescending that Paula said, "awww," and Simon, "aren't you cute" when she walked in (she's a person, not a poodle), but I was also impressed that a voice that huge could come out of someone that small.
Syesha Mercado, who sang "Think" - the power-of-positive-thinking girl was certainly pretty and seemed to have a great attitude, but was she really that impressive vocally?
Natashia Blach, who sang "At Last" - we hardly got to see anything of Natashia's audition, didn't get any of her backstory, but I thought she had one of the nicest voices yet.
Best Simon line of the night, about Ghaleb Emachah:
"I would like you if I was drunk. You're out on the town in Miami, a few margaritas, you start singing, I'm drinking, I quite like you. Sober, I don't think it works."
What do you think? Are you about ready for the auditions to be over? And what do you make of Simon and Randy's newfound chumminess?
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OK so is it just me or are the auditions just dragging on eternally at this point I mean Ive always enjoyed them but now Im ready for the real singing to start Alas next Tuesdays episode will mean yet another location for American Idol Atlanta this time Hopefully the auditions wont be too painful and Hollywood week will make it all worthwhileI did kind of like the Miami Vice music and opening credits though Im not sure who Ryan thought he was channeling in those sunglasses Don Johnson circa 1984 he is not He wasnt the only one sporting some odd duds The first day Randy was wearing some blindingly shiny red-patent shoes which may have actually been topped on the second day by his equally shiny purple embroidered shirt And Paula was seriously busting out of her clothes Mustve been awfully hot in Miami for her to wear so little out in public much less on camera Even Simon commented on it Thats a very short dress Paula very sluttyHas anyone e