And they couldn't have said it better. This is the show where the term "24" will take on a whole new meaning. In other words, there will be no Jack Bauer to save any of the final few. We're going down to 24 tonight, and if any of you use the web like I do, you already know who they are. There are to be some disappointments, but there may also be some happy surprises. The full list can be found by reading the entirety of my blog, entering a special code-word, verifying you read every last word and then holding your breath for five minutes. You may be woozy, but it will be worth the wait.
I was going to call this blog: "Oh, My God, It's Late and I Haven't Even Watched the Show Yet!" but thought better of it. It's 1 am and I am finally ready to watch. I'm all atwitter.
A lot of fuss is made about this being the toughest Hollywood week yet, and now we're ready for the final judgment. So, if you were being judged, wouldn't you want a chair a little bit more comfortable than the cane-backed one they strap each contestant to? It's more like a torture device, and I find I am nervous for the Idols. Am I gonna cry??? No, Randy, I am not ready for the truth.
OK, I'm ready now. Go! And we're off and running.
The winners and why:
Boy 1: Sanjaya (who still needs a haircut). Hmmm. Not feeling it so much with his rendition of "Some Kind of Wonderful." He has mixed emotions because his sister has not made it through. Simon says it's satisfying that he made it through, but Sanjaya corrects him to say it's bittersweet. After all, he doesn't want to be cut out of the family dowry. Sanjaya is the first one through! And he's not the only one with mixed emotions. One down, 23 more to go.
Girl 1: Melinda walks in so scared, but it's OK because we love her!!! I've got to add the
ENTIRE speech from Simon:
"Basically, there's a reason why you are a backup singer because normally someone else is better than you." (Cut to Melinda sort of absently nodding in agreement, her hopes being dashed to the floor.) "You may be surprised when I tell you you're good enough to stand at the front of the stage and you're through to the next round." (Cut to Melinda holding her smiling face to keep the happiness in.) Simon continues with the good news, "This was unanimous; you are no longer a backup singer." Simon calls her over, kisses her and says, "I'm really pleased for you." You know Melinda has a career no matter what happens from here on out. And I couldn't be happier!
Boy 2: Brandon Rogers sang "Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman" during Hollywood week. I got chills; if you could see the goose bumbs on my arms. Randy gets to dole out this good news, "I know you've been singing backups for a while with a bunch of people. I guess you've finally earned your spot as a lead singer welcome! You made it. You made it, baby!" Ever notice that Randy ends every sentence with either "dawg" or "baby"? Anyhow, Brandon doesn't have to worry about being "stuck behind someone else" anymore. Happiness all around!
Girl 2: Gina Glockson worked her butt off during Season 5 and it all ended in sadness and tears. But this year, in Hollywood, she sang "Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman", which will go on to be the most sung tune that week. Here's what I hate: when the judges make it sound like the contestant, who is already tense enough, isn't going to make it through. Paula is the proud deliverer of the news and a teary-eyed Gina nods "OK" because she has been made to believe it's over. Then Paula pulls out the steak knife and says, "I know it's OK, 'cause you're gonna see us more." And Gina provides the best reaction of the night, "Shut up!" I laughed out loud. She deserves it! And I, for one, am excited to see more of her. Simon is smiling keep it up, sir.
Girl 3: Haley Scarnato, whatever. I think she was completely off-key in Hollywood. But the judges think differently. Could it be the hootchy outfits? "Sweet and pretty" made it through.
Boy 3: Phil Stacy is pretty darn good-looking, though I'm not so sure about the hat. During Hollywood week, Randy and Paula could be seen swaying to his rendition of "Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman," which rivaled Brandon's, if you ask me. Randy offers the "moment of truth. Dude, you're through. You made it." He screams to the camera! Simon once again shows his pearly whites. he has a very good dentist. Those teeth are sparkling.
If only there could be like a hundred thousand commercials. Wouldn't that be great?
And then the
Simpsons montage. I liked the comic caricature of Brandon. But not sure why we had to sit through the contestants sitting through watching the new
Simpsons movie. Oh, yeah,
Simpsons, Fox. Fox. Fox. Fox.
Boy 4: Chris Sligh has the best entrance of any of the Idols, walking in to the judgment room, "I bet you're all wondering why I called this meeting today," and we're once again treated to some of his much-needed humor. The judges all laughed and I got chills up my spine when Chris sang during his Hollywood audition. According to his website, Chris is a "Christ-follower" first and a rock star second. Fortunately, Christ has led him to the promised land which is the top 24. Simon says he is "one of the most popular contestants." Chris sports a great personality, though Simon tells him he wasn't one of the better singers. But it's just a way to stall things for a half-second so he can say, "Unfortunately, you're gonna be seeing a lot of us. You've made it through."
Boy 5: Blake Lewis of the boy Supergroup who sang a phenomenal version of the Bee Gees' "How Deep Is Your Love." Simon tries to dash hopes when he reminds Blake, "It's a singing competition, you understand that, yeah? And our decision had to be made on the singing. Blake," dramatic pause, "you're through," meaning to the next round, but if you think about it, it could mean exactly the opposite. We're happy that in Beat Boy's case, it doesn't.
Boy 6: Rudy Cardenas takes a spot in the winner's circle. I have nothing else to say. Either he's left a small impression or it is way past my bedtime.
Boy 7: Paul Kim will be barefoot whenever he is on stage from this point forward. Is this a Cesaria Evora thing? No, it's just "his thing." We also get to hear about the crusty underwear he wears on every cut day. Let's hope the hotel has laundry service. Paul sang well in Hollywood not bad, my friend. Judges had a "split decision," on Paul, but finally give him his due: "You're going to have to come back and see Simon's face." Come to think of it, that might NOT be the best way to look at it.
Girl 4: Jordin Sparks, our 17-year-old wunderkind, who was one of the "brighter spots in Seattle." Randy also says she "fell apart in Hollywood week." We heard her sing "Some Kind of Wonderful," and I'm wondering what the Hades Randy is talking about. He must be high, because he is way off base. Anyway, she makes it through and leaves excited and hyperventilating.
Boy 8: AJ Tabaldo makes it through. Was it just me or was he terrible in Hollywood? I would be willing to trade this spot in for someone else.
Girl 5: Stephanie Edwards is the best thing since Dionne Warwick. The judges tell her, "You haven't failed, you've made it." She's so happy... I'm so happy. We're all happy.
Girl 6: Leslie Hunt, whom I don't remember ever seeing, sang like a young Bonnie Raitt. During her judgment, she looked back and forth at those wacky judges waiting for the verdict. They send her through. She's got an interesting thing about her; I can't quite put my finger on it. But there's something.
Boy 9: Nick Pedro also sang the "Love a Woman" song - Hello! Chills again. Maybe it's just freezing in my apartment, but I thought it was great! He made it through. Nick called his sister to share the happy news and she yells like a crazy woman. Moments like this.
Girl 7: Alaina Alexander, our struggling singer, is hoping for tears of joy and she chooses standing over sitting, but then acquiesces when asked to sit. She doesn't want to go home. She tells them she felt she gave all she could give, though when she sang, she was off-key. Please, don't give any more excuses.Ouch! Surprisingly, or not, she makes it through. "I'm gonna work so hard. Is there anything you can tell me to help me?" Brilliantly and without missing a beat, Simon says, "Blow your nose." Moments like this.
Boy 10: Chris Richardson: the JT-alike wasn't in the room of doom for more than two seconds before Randy shouted, "You in the house." Chris does some hand-slapping thing with all the judges and turns saying, "That's a long walk." He won't have to do it again, I assure you. This kid is going to make it to the final rounds, if I have anything to say about it. (Oh, you didn't know Simon takes all his cues from me? Oh, wait, he's calling me right now, I have to talk to him about some lineup changes. BRB.)
Girl 8: Sabrina Sloan fantastic! She gives one of the best Hollywood week performances. So it's just pure evilness when Simon says, "We have decided not" (dramatic pause) "to exclude you." Sabrina's eyes roll into the back of her head as if it is on the chopping block, but makes a quick save and melts into happiness. In her elevator cam ride she screeches, "I love this show." Perhaps she could cheer up.
Girl 9: Lakeesha Jones, oh, there you are, girl. I was worried! Lakeesha is anxious to know the verdict. Will she have to go back counting 10s and 20s at the bank? She's the best singer in the whole kit and caboodle. The judges meanly say, "I am sorry to tell you." Then, Simon says, "Well done. Sweetheart, you're a great singer."
Randy shoots off a "Lakeesha's in the Idol house."
Girl 10: Nicole Tranquillo I think she looks like a young Sheryl Crow and sounds like Laura Nyro, which is all good. She gets a simple, "You made it."
Boy 11: Jared Cotter he's cute and will have to stand in for the missing Jenry, who was too young for us to ogle. Jared's of legal drinking age, and he's made it as well.
Girl 11: Amy Krebs is another contestant we have not seen before and, wow, looking at her I would have never guessed she could sing. But I would have been wrong. Kids, the moral of this lesson is, "You cannot judge a book by its cover."
OK, when they add the second caned chair in the room of doom, and then force the final two male and female participants to sit together knowing full well only one of each is making it through, well, I genuinely hate this part. It makes me as nervous as watching figure skating. Seriously, my face was shielded from my hands and I got so tense, I now have a pinched nerve. Calgon, take me away.
Girl 12: Antonella and Marissa are up against each other and both are fantastic singers. Why these two girls are sitting here together is anyone's guess. They should both be going through. However, Marissa is being sent home. Randy wants to "bring down the truth: Antonella you are through. Marissa this is the end of the line." Now there is little about this decision that makes sense to me. Paula offers some words of encouragement to the disbelieving Marissa, "You are world-class. Very talented." All Marissa can say is, "I don't understand." Now, I'm practically in tears as she slides down the side of the elevator grieving, "how did this happen?" Antonella tries logic, which is useless in a moment like this. Marissa, standing in the dark, cool night says, "No one was expecting it." But you know what, sweetie, you don't need
Idol. You've got what it takes to make it without this show. So, go get 'em! We'll all be watching.
Boy 12: Sundance or Thomas. I can't take the stress! Thomas can't either, and is jumping in the elevator. OK, so this one goes pretty much the way of the other one. I think Thomas should have gone through, but we know from previous posts that he'd be sent home for any variety of reasons. I don't think he needs
Idol, either. He's fantastic. One of the judges says, "Tommy, you're brilliant. You both have huge, bright futures." I was willing to give Sundance one more chance, but then he went and said something completely stupid to Thomas, which is another reason I don't understand why he's gone through. He said, "If I make it, I'll make you my bodyguard." Kind of an
Extras moment. At this rate, Sundance, I don't think you're in any position to offer Thomas a job that you might be better suited for yourself.
You've got to wonder what the other criteria are.
Buh-bye (I'm only mentioning a few because it's 3 am and only a few are worth mentioning):
" Anna Kearns, aka Giraffe, wanted to know, "For real?"
" Tami Gosnell - What???? Now that's a shame.
" Tatiana McConnico - I wonder what happened there. She was very good in the initial audition.
" Matthew Buckstein - "No cowboys this year."
Until next week, I bid you all a good night what's left of it!
And they couldnt have said it better. This is the show where the term 24 will take on a whole new meaning. In other words, there will be no Jack Bauer to save any of the final few. Were going down to 24 tonight, and if any of you use the web like I do, you already know who they are. There are to be some disappointments, but there may also be some happy surprises. The full list can be found by reading the entirety of my blog, entering a special code-word, verifying you read every last word and then holding your breath for five minutes. You may be woozy, but it will be worth the wait. I was going to call this blog: Oh, My God, Its Late and I Havent Even Watched the Show Yet! but thought better of it. Its 1 am and I am finally ready to watch. Im all atwitter. A lot of fuss is made about this being the toughest Hollywood week yet, and now were ready for the final judgment. So, if you were being judged, wouldnt you w...