Slow Down, American Idol
David Archuleta by Frank Micelotta/Fox
I can't believe I'm saying this, not exactly being a champion of Fox's tendency to let
American Idol spread across the schedule like untamed kudzu, but Tuesday's overstuffed Neil Diamond episode should have been at least 90 minutes. Not that it left me wanting more - anything but - but could the show itself have been more of a train wreck? (And I'm not just talking Jason Castro here.) Cramming 10 performances, and the usual inane "mentor" moments, into a single hour had Ryan Seacrest going from 33 1/3 to 78 rpm - for those who remember turntables - and poor Paula Abdul even more confused than usual, thinking she'd heard Jason sing
twice. (I get it, though. When Jason sings these days, it's like time stands still and the world goes into a musical coma.)
Didn't Ryan say when the show started that the judges were going to hold their comments until after the second performance? So maybe he's at fault for giving the judges a chance to weigh in after the first round was over. Mistake. Whatever. The entire production was an embarrassing mess this week. And it's not like anyone would have missed the obnoxious
Hell's Kitchen.
Much has been made over
trade reports that
Idol producers are doing market research, mulling over changes for next season - not a bad idea for a show this "mature." Could we suggest just dropping these mentor/theme episodes for a start? I'm not against them dipping into genres and decades and even specific songbooks - Gershwin, anyone? - but this drippy mutual idol worship typically adds little to the show, except filler that's as needless as it is painful.
Speaking of painful, how is Jason Castro still on this show? (Imagine how much more musically memorable a Neil Diamond night might have been if Michael Johns and Carly Smithson were still around?) Brooke White, as uptight as Jason is regrettably laid-back, is someone you want to hug and tell her it will all be over soon and that she did her best. Syesha? Polished performer, OK singer, capable of sizzle when she gets the right song, but probably more suitable to the old
Star Search than to
American Idol. At this point, as it has been for a while, it's pretty much all about the Davids. Cook possibly too confident, but like Paula, I look and watch and see an Idol in action. Archuleta the boy wonder - but prodigy,
really? - in the demographic sweet spot, coming alive only when the music starts. Think Osmond. Every generation seems to want one.
All of the singers (except maybe Jason, who looked like he couldn't have cared less), and certainly the audience, deserved better of a No. 1 show than what they got this week.
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