Ryan P., Ashley Hebert Ryan P., Ashley Hebert

Oh man. Actually, oh men.

So last night, The Bachelorette returned with Brad Womack also-ran Ashley Hebert (apparently pronounced "Ayy-bear") and 25 guys who, true to form, need some help. And we're not even talking about the eliminated dudes who got all teary following the Rose Ceremony — even though those messes should turn in their reproductive organs for acting all "she was the one" after five hours of booze-soaked sucking up.

No, we're talking about the fellas who got the roses. Not all of them — the Ryans seem to be equal parts hot and sane, and Matt is cute enough to get away with calling his mom —but there were enough oddballs who made the cut to make us worry about Ash's taste in potential husbands. Like Mask Guy? Or Stringy-Haired Wine Guy? Dental-Floss Guy? Come on, hon, you can do better. And don't even get us started on the fact that she kept cro-mag (and clearly insincere) Bentley around, despite being warned by former franchise vets about his shady motives for appearing on the show. Sorry, but that sort of decision screams either "stupid girl" or "staged drama!"

Then again, The Bachelorette has never been about the bachelorette. It's about her pec-popping stable of suitors and how they eventually devolve into sniping himbos who sell one another out faster than they can strip down and hit the hot tub. And based on last night's catty cocktail party chatter, it looks like Ashley has lined up a roster of real champs. The true fun, however, will be when the group dates start and we get to see which ones are the real chumps.

Did you watch The Bachelorette last night? Have any early faves? Or early skeeves?

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