Question: I know that you have answered a lot of One Tree Hill questions in the past few weeks despite the fact that you hate the show, but can you please give me some scoop to tide me over until January?

Answer: (Spoiler alert) As luck would have it, I recently secured the services of a new OTH mole, and he/she had lots of prattle about the time-leaping season premiere. Per my spy, Lucas has written a successful first book, but due to a case of writer's block, he's having a hard time churning out a follow-up. He has also gotten involved with the Ravens, most likely as an assistant coach. Brooke, meanwhile, is off in New York being a successful fashion designer. The name of her inaugural line? Clothes over Bros. I'll have scoop on the rest of the OTH gang in next week's AA. (I'd just like to point out that I got through an entire OTH answer without making one snarky comment about what a huge pile of brown stinky stuff the show is. Props to me.)