The Big Bang Theory: This Is the Order Sheldon Should Eat His Friends

In Thursday's The Big Bang Theory, "The Escape Hatch Identification," Sheldon (Jim Parsons), lover of contingency plans, disclosed that he knows the order in which he'd eat his friends in the event of an apocalypse.

"Penny (Kaley Cuoco) would be the entree, then Leonard's (Johnny Galecki) basically a cheese course, and because I love you, you're dessert," he told Amy (Mayim Bialik).

But that's only some of his friends. He has a few more he has to account for.

This is how I think he'd eat the rest of them.

1. Kripke (John Ross Bowie): too annoying to keep around.

2. Bert (Brian Posehn): He's a big guy who could feed a lot of people.

3. Halley: Babies are liabilities in post-apocalyptic situations. And Sheldon probably loves The Road.

4. Stuart (Kevin Sussman): He's not strong enough to be a survivor. As this episode proved, having a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire doesn't automatically make you Negan from The Walking Dead.

5. Raj (Kunal Nayyar): Similarly to Stuart, Raj is too soft to make it. His pampered lifestyle has left him ill-equipped to thrive in an apocalyptic setting, and he may be a liability.

6. Howard (Simon Helberg): Howard's very crafty so he's worth keeping alive for a long time. Eating him would be a sign things are very bad for Sheldon's party.

Then Penny, Leonard and Amy, and finally,

10. Bernadette (Melissa Rauch): There's no way Sheldon would be able to kill Bernie before it's her time to go. She's small, but she's fearsome. She'd eat him before he ate her.

The Big Bang Theory airs Thursdays at 8/7c on CBS.

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