Ulong lost immunity again on last week's Survivor: Palau, spelling the end for yet another tribe member. This time it was mumbling James Miller, the 33-year-old Alabaman who insisted they'd win the rope-knotting challenge thanks to his Navy background. When TVGuide.com met him in New York City to ask what went wrong, we got quite a bit more than we bargained for. Despite weather in the mid-30s, James arrived wearing only ripped jeans and a T-shirt. The self-proclaimed "redneck" also brought along a charming accessory — his tough-talking stripper wife, Brandi, whose skimpy attire was also seasonally inappropriate and who sat in his lap during the entire interview.
TVGuide.com: You seem underprepared for today's frosty temperature.
James Miller: I know it. I'm a redneck and we come out of 61 degrees [back home], and I'm thinking we'll be all right. Uh-uh. I froze my ass off.
TVG: Don't you have a jacket?
James: Uh-uh. I ain't never owned a coat. Ain't never needed one.
TVG: OK, then. What would you have done differently on Survivor?
James: I would have not voted Angie off. I would have got rid of Bobby Jon. I knew I had Stephanie on my side, and I knew I had Angie on my side. Bobby Jon makes his own decisions when he gets to tribal council. If I had got rid of him, then on the next one, Ibrehemwould have went. No doubt.
TVG: You, Bobby Jon and Ibrehem are all Alabama boys. Why didn't you get along?
James: Ibrehem is from Birmingham, but he's been raised in the city somewhere. If he's from the South, he don't know how to work a hammer, a nail or a shovel. It's like he ain't never done no work in his life, like his parents catered to him. He was just getting in the way.
TVG: I thought you and Bobby Jon were tight?
James: I thought so too, but he assumed that I voted for him. I didn't; it was Stephanie. I hope he feels like s--t. I hope Stephanie feels like crap.
TVG: So you didn't know Stephanie lied until you saw the episode?
James: Exactly. I couldn't believe that. But it's all right because my lovely wife here, you know what she's going to do when we get to the finale? They're going to tango. It's going to be a cage match. [Brandi nods enthusiastically.]
TVG: Some of your comments about religion and sexuality were very un-PC. Anything you regret saying?
James: No. You are a human being; you've got a right to say what you want, right? If it offends somebody, they've got the right to be offended. As long as there ain't no physical violence. I can't come over there and slap the hell out of you for calling me a redneck. But you have the right to say, "You are just a stupid redneck."
TVG: [Uncomfortably] I wouldn't say that.
James: Of course, because you are polite person. But even if you thought that, you've got a right to say that. But I wouldn't get on your ass. That ain't fair. I've got a right to say what I think.
TVG: So there's nothing you saw of yourself on TV that you wanted to take back?
James: No. But I was funny at it... right? If I want to get to the point and tell people what I think, sometimes I can be not too nice about it. But, most of the time, I try to be funny about it and they understand.
TVG: With your Navy know-how, you claimed to be excellent at tying knots. But the other tribe untied them so quickly. Do your Navy pals give you a hard time about that?
James: No. I've been in hiding, and I ain't talked to nobody. I don't go out much. I'm a homeboy; I take care of the kids and [Brandi] takes her clothes off for money. I'm tellin' you, I need a job. The knot was tight, you just didn't see it. It took them a long time to untie it. What you saw was just the after-effects of it. That's just good TV.
TVG: Your team just kept losing and getting beaten...
James: That was our strategy.
TVG: To just completely lose?
James: [Jokingly] Yeah. We figured if we ain't going to win the $1 million, we'll just get in the Guinness Book of World Records.
TVG: Maybe you'll get your own Pringle chip.
James: It's gonna be "Who is the only tribe in Survivor history to never win an immunity challenge?" And it's gonna say, "Ulong"! [The producers] didn't put in one of the things I said. They asked, "If you could give your tribe a different name, what would you call it?" I said, "I'd call it, You Ain't Got Long."
TVG: How much weight did you lose? You were looking really skinny out there.
James: I looked like death warmed over, didn't I? I lost a lot of weight, I think 22 lbs.
TVG: Would you ever do anything like this again?
James: Oh, hell yeah. I'll know next time to eat as much coconut as I can, even if it is a laxative.
TVG: Wow. Camp must have been fun.
James: It was stanky. I'm telling you, don't eat coconut! Stay away from the milk!
TVG: Any other reality shows you'd like to do?
James: I wanted to go on The Amazing Race. But we can't do it because Boston Rob already beat me to it, the little son of a beeyatch.
TVG: Even though you lost, was Survivor a good experience?
James: It was the best experience I ever had. It was life changing. Me and [my wife] used to not get along too well. We argued a lot because we didn't see things eye to eye. And the kids got on my nerves sometimes, because that is just what they do. I went there and come back, and I thank God. I took my wife and kids for granted. You've got one life to live — I need to get on that soap opera, too! — but it is about her and the kids.
TVG: Do you think you were the most deserving person to win?
James: I was the most broke person out there. I deserved $1 million in that aspect. Did I earn it more than anybody? No.
TVG: What's next?
James: [Rambling] What am I going to do now? Probably [be] a talk-show host somewhere; it's gonna be funny. It ain't gonna be silly like some of these folks. Soap-opera star, movie star, commercials — but a million-dollar commercial, I won't go for less than that. You've got all these movie stars out there who get $20 million a movie and they want more, more and more. On $1 million, I can live the rest of my life in a motor home somewhere and nobody's got to worry.
Brandi: On 8 Mile.
James: 9 Mile. Right now we are living at 7 Mile and it is rough.
TVG: So back to your plan for the finale...
James: Brandi's going to stomp some ass. She won't get physical, but she'll give [Stephanie] a piece of her mind.
Brandi: I was really, really disappointed in [Stephanie]. I was all talking about how pretty she was and how good she was, and then I couldn't believe it. She just ruined it.
TVG: Weren't you prepared for the lying and backstabbing?
James: Uh-uh. I didn't think that was going to happen until later on.
TVG: So you never watched Boston Rob in action?
James: Yeah, but Boston Rob? He's an [expletive]. You know, none of us were [like that in Palau]. There really weren't any buttholes; they were just lazy.