Janay Rice is standing by her husband, Ray Rice, after a video was released showing the former NFL running back knocking her unconscious in a hotel elevator.
In a lengthy Instagram post that the Baltimore Sun confirms was intended to be made public, Janay discussed the trauma of being forced to relive the incident now that the tape has been leaked without her consent.
"I woke up this morning feeling like I had a horrible nightmare, feeling like I'm mourning the death of my closest friend. But you have to accept the fact that reality is a nightmare in itself," she wrote. "No one knows the pain that the media and unwanted [opinions] from the public has caused my family. To make us relive a moment in our lives that we regret every day is a horrible thing."
Janay, who has been in counseling with Ray since the incident in February, added that the Baltimore Ravens decision to release her husband (only after the video was leaked) doesn't help her. "To take something away from the man I love that he has worked his ass off for all his life just to gain ratings is horrific. THIS IS OUR LIFE! What don't you all get," Janay continued. "If your intentions were to hurt us, embarrass us, make us feel alone, take all happiness away, you succeeded on so many levels. Just know we will continue to grow and show the world what real love is! Ravens nation we love you!"
According to a New Jersey court summons, Ray was accused of assaulting Janay on February 15. The NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell suspended Rice without pay for two games over the incident, but following TMZ releasing footage of the attack and the aftermath on Monday the athlete's contract was terminated and he was suspended from the league indefinitely.