On Tuesday, Parks and Recreationwill say goodbye. In addition to being hilarious and heartfelt, the final season of Parks was - literally - ahead of its time because of the jump ahead to 2017. Just like Back to the Future Part II gave viewers a slice of hope about hoverboards and self-tying shoe laces in 2015, the Parks writers took many opportunities to craft a very crazy future. While it may not be as wonderful as a world in which President William Henry Harrison wore a coat, the Great Depression lasted just a week and The Wire swept the Emmys - we can dream can't we? - we ranked what's coming up in 2017 from best to worst. In the words of Pawnee tastemaker Annabel Porter, let's "binge-watch the future":
1. Flying, talking robots. Yes please! Just as long as they aren't delivering presents based on information that tech companies obtained by snooping on us, obviously.
2. Khaleesi weds Jack Sparrow on the Game of Thrones finale. In recent years, Johnny Depp has starred in some very questionable roles (see: Mortdecai, Transcedence, The Lone Ranger) so it's the perfect time for the Pirates of the Caribbean star to go back to his biggest and most beloved character. And according to Ben, who is basically one of the biggest nerds on television today, "it makes sense if you read the books." We'll take his word for it.
3. New celebrity feuds. It may be hard to believe now, but eventually, the Katy Perry-Taylor Swift feud is going to run out of steam. So, as much as we do not condone celebrity arguments, our curiosity has been piqued about what on Earth Shailene Woodley and Morgan Freeman will be feuding about. Ditto for Nicki Minaj and Jesse Eisenberg.
4. Tiny rolled scrolls delivered by foxes. Was April being sarcastic or serious when she told Leslie that is the latest form of communication young people are using in 2017? It's unclear, but we'll find out soon enough.
5. Elton John buys Chick-fil-A. Will all the restaurants strictly play his songs only? How will he redesign the restaurants to be more in line with his truly unique aesthetic? This is a win all around.
6. Kevin James stars in the reboot of The Bourne Identity franchise. Sure, the most recent reboot headlined by Jeremy Renner was kind of a snooze. But now that Matt Damon is reportedly returning to the franchise, how will the former King of Queens star fit into all of this? Also, Kevin James, really? Then again, who would have really believed a few years ago that Matthew McConaughey was going to win an Oscar? So, we'll take Leslie's word for it that James "nailed it." However, here's hoping this film doesn't affect his involvement with another 2017 sequel, Hitch 2: Son of a Hitch.
7. Shia LaBeouf-designed wedding dresses. Again, this is a bit of a head-scratcher. But so is basically everything Shia did in 2014. And after his arrest during a production of Cabaret and his apology tour, maybe it's good that Shia will find a way to harness all his pent-up artistic energy for good instead of evil, er, selfish reasons. Just please don't let paper bags be the new wedding veils.
8. Shia LaBeouf-designed engagement rings. This seems like a much harder profession to just pick up. Especially in just three years.
9. 2017 trends. There are worse things to spend a ridiculous amount of money on than elbow bedazzling. Case in point: Sushi made from fish previously owned by celebrities. Vintage clothing is one thing, but vintage food is quite another. And let's not even talk about asymmetrical overalls.
10. Pulitzer Prizes are going to be awarded for "Best Top 10 Listicle." Sure, this very article is kind of a listicle, but any real journalist will tell you all the reasons why this is the worst thing ever. Isn't losing journalism pioneers like Bob Simon and David Carr in one week punishment enough for our community?
The Parks and Recreation finale airs Tuesday at 10/9c on NBC.
Parks and Recreation Video: See every time someone talks about Ben's butt!