Week 1 of the London Olympics is in the books and it's given us some unforgettable and historic moments. From Michael Phelps' record-breaking 19th medal and Gabby Douglas' all-around gold to the expulsion of eight badminton players for throwing their matches, the first seven days definitely got people talking.Samuel L. Jackson. (And keep following the funny during the games with our Olympic Witstream!) "Gabby Douglas just earned herself a spot in a promo for a new NBC sitcom 4 years from now." — Patrick Ryan (@PatrickRyan) on WitStream"My wife is watching Olympic rowing or, as I call it, Curling of Summer." — Dylan Brody (@dylanbrody) on Witstream"But seriously, does anyone really try when playing badminton?" — Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) on Witstream"Bela Karolyi is my favorite Sacha Baron Cohen character." — Jensen Karp (@JensenClan88) on Witstream"EVERYBODY SHUT UP! SEACREST IS INTERVIEWING MICHAEL PHELPS' MOM AND SISTER," said no one anywhere ever ever." — Danny Zuker (@DannyZuker)"UPDATE: Thanks to NBC's tape delay, we are just now learning that Jesse Owens' gold medal in the 100-meters may have upset the Führer." — Scott Bateman (@Disalmanac) on WitStream"I threw my badminton game today so I could get to cocktails faster." — Steve Martin (@SteveMartinToGo)"Imagine if NBC had hired Ricky Gervais & Karl Pilkington to be their roving reporters in the field in London." — Josh Charles (@MrJoshCharles)"I don't know if Nigeria played mostly zone or mostly man last night, but they should have done the opposite." — Seth Meyers (@sethmeyers21)"The entirety of the female gymnastic commentator's job is to say, 'Just the dismount...'" — Michael Ian Black (@michaelianblack)"Casey Anthony gives warmer hugs than female Olympic gymnasts." — Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5)"Watching the Olympics on NBC is like watching BREAKING BAD on Monday." — Damon Lindelof (@DamonLindelof)"Note to @michaelphelps. Channel your inner Walter White. As you look at the water imagine blue crystal and say to yourself, I AM the danger!" — Bryan Cranston (@BryanCranston)@SamuelLJackson):"OK, so the Russian almost busts her Ass a few times on the BEAM, Damn near FALLS on the dismount & OUR guy says PHENOMINAL?!" "Okay, that was Drunk Lady Staggering Flip dismount! Made famous by many girls missing the top step in da club!""Okaaaay!!! NBC analyst Ato Boldon says he can STILL go 10.8 in the 100 meters, 'probably as fast as the women'! I call BULLSH--!""DREAM REALISED!!!!! US Gymnastic GOLD!! Strong performances! Pressure makes DIAMONDS!!! Go USA!""Allison Schmitt!!!!! Hope they got pics of her soles, cause that's ALL they saw!!! Go USA!!!!!""WAIT A MINUTE! WTF?! Badfuqqinminton players tossed for THROWING games?! Really? ... Strategy My Ass! World Class WUSSES!!!""Hater Judge in there somewhere!""Commentator says, 'he's really good on Pommel Horse'! Must be in practice! We're still waiting! Another fuggin 12!""Uh Oh, Pommel Horse next! Thass like Balance Beam for dudes! Horse def has US men's numba! Oh well, Go USA!""Homie SAT DOWN on the horse! For reals...they look scared!""I'm baaaaaack! Thanks for the updates! WTF's up w/ the Gymnast dudes?! The big stage is eating that ASS!""Looking like the Chinese wz just laying' low till it counted! They goin' NINJA....if that's possible.....for a...u no what I mean!""Massive German Facial on high bar! OUCH like a MUPFUGGUH!!"
- 1. Grey's Anatomy: Arizona & Alex: The First Flight
- 2. Desperate Housewives: Actors Picking up Character Traits
- 3. Mistresses: Toni Seduces Dom While Savi's Away
- 4. Empire: Pilot
- 5. Scandal: Randy, Red, Superfreak and Julia
- 6. The Vampire Diaries: A Bird in a Gilded Cage
- 7. The Blacklist: The Longevity Initiative