Our top TV moments of the week:
11. Best Drunken Advice: Self-professed "lush" Gwyneth Paltrow had trouble getting into the alcoholic mindset of her character in her upcoming film Country Strong, but she knew exactly who to turn to for some pointers: Robert Downey Jr. Paltrow tells Chelsea Handler on her Big Interview Special that her Iron Man pal "wrote me the most amazing e-mail and he helped me understand it." Or, you know, you could just watch Intervention.
10. Worst Timing: On Chuck, Sarah treks half-way across the world to save Chuck from a Belgian trying to remove the Intersect from his brain. But while Chuck lays trapped in a dream, with each of his non-Intersect memories being ripped out, Sarah declares she found his proposal outline and wants to marry him.
9. Biggest Heartbreaker: After proposing to his ex-wife-turned-girlfriend on House, Wilson is left on one knee with his jaw hanging open when Sam storms away in anger because she thinks he has trust issues stemming from some shady medical paperwork she filed. And to add insult to injury, she walks out on him even after he apologizes — for what, we still don't know.
8. Worst Discovery: While Dexter and Lumen are tracking down those involved with her assault on Dexter, namely Jordan Chase, the inspirational speaker has been doing some digging of his own. Jordan calls Dexter's home — yes, his old home, where Lumen resides. He asks to leave his trademark message for Dexter, "Tick, tick, tick. That's the sound of his life running out," he says before signing off with, "Take care, Lumen."
7. Best Shout-Out: During a game of Truth or Dare on How I Met Your Mother, Zoey dares Marshall to take a picture of his junk and send it to a random number. She asks for MacLaren's patrons to call out numbers. "4815162342," Blitz (guest star and Lost alum Jorge Garcia) says. So there you have it: Hurley's lottery numbers are a phone number.
6. Most Impressive: We know Fred Armisen has seniority over Saturday Night Live newbie Jay Pharoah, but maybe it's time for a change in command when it comes to impersonating President Barack Obama. After sharing his dead-on impressions of Denzel Washington and Will Smith on The Late Show with David Letterman, Pharoah — at the host's request and somewhat sheepishly — unleashes his killer Obama. Be sure to check out Pharoah's arsenal of accurate impersonations here.
5. Best Redemption: After calling Kurt a gay slur last year and then failing to stick up for him against the treacherous school bully, Finn finally learns the true meaning of friendship and acceptance on Glee. He not only performs a special rendition of Bruno Mars' "Just the Way You Are" for Kurt at his mom's wedding to Kurt's dad, but also dances hand-in-hand with Kurt for all to see — a big step for our favorite (if not slightly ignorant) leading man.
4. Best Discovery: A testament to The Good Wife's ability to perfectly balance the Case of the Week with serialized storytelling, Alicia finally finds out about the "I've loved you for 15 years" voicemail Will left her (and Eli promptly deleted without telling her) while listening to wiretap evidence on a client. Stunned and at least a little delighted, she rushes to his office to discuss the meaning behind the message when Will's sort-of girlfriend Tammy pops in. To be continued soon? Please?
3. Most Self-Aware: Yeah, yeah, Jennifer Grey won Dancing with the Stars, but the true champ is David Hasselhoff. Back for one last dance, the actor, who was eliminated first, busts out his old Baywatch gear — and his own bikini-clad dancers, including partner Kym Johnson — to dance and sing "I'm Always Here" (the Baywatch theme) for some good ol' self-deprecating, cheesy fun. Makes us wonder what could've been this season.
2. American Idol Award: The world got a blast from boy band past on the American Music Awards when New Kids on the Block took the stage with the Backstreet Boys — henceforth known as NKOTBSB — for their first-ever live TV performance. The boy band behemoth performed a snappily choreographed mash-up of each group's greatest hits — BSB's "Everybody (Backstreet's Back)," "I Want It That Way" and "Larger Than Life," and NKOTB's' "Hangin' Tough," "Step By Step" and "You Got It (The Right Stuff)" — that had everyone from lifelong fans to Train's Pat Monahan on their feet and singing along, all hailing the once and future pop gods.
1. Trick and Treat Award: Feeling extra generous in her last year in syndication, Oprah Winfrey planned two episodes of the mass hysteria/ode to consumerism that is "Oprah's Favorite Things" — excuse us, make that "Oprah's Ultimate Favorite Things." Pulling a fast one on audience No. 2, Winfrey tells the clueless crowd that they must be disappointed to not be beneficiaries of her largesse after seeing audience No. 1 file out with a sleigh-ful of new loot (including a 3-D TV that retails for $3,600). But then ... out rolls an ornament. "It's beginning to look a lot like ... FAVORITE THIIIIIIIIIIIINGS!" she bellows. This group lucks out with maybe the only thing better than a 3-D TV: the revamped 2012 Volkswagen Beetle that won't even be revealed for another six months. What are we going to do without Santa O next year?