Man UP Man UP

Oh, ABC. How adorable that you felt that your sad new sitcom Man Up! (8:30/7:30c) deserves an exclamation point. As in, maybe: Yikes, this sucks! The network describes this latest "comedy" about male insecurities as being "in the vein of The Hangover." Only in the vein of people who watch The Hangover and think: Boy, I wish I could be that funny.

As I noted in our Fall Preview issue, this one is "An insult to all genders. Fall TV's 'woe is man' trend [which has already hit the skids in two quickly canceled sitcoms, NBC's Free Agents and CBS's How to Be a Gentleman] goes belly up in a charmless buddy comedy where three tiresome stooges question their embattled masculinity while we ponder why ABC would pair this with the similarly themed Last Man Standing."

Put it this way: Tim Allen's character on Last Man Standing would revile the whiny neurotics taking center stage here, as they play video games at night to fantasize about what it would be like to say "I'm the man" and mean it. Meanwhile, the women in their lives snark and sneer, one calling her husband "man-nish" after mocking his fondness for pomegranate body wash. (To be fair, he has just nagged her to buy the non-dairy version of their hazelnut creamer.)

It's emasculation time in suburbia, as opposite-of-alpha male Will (Mather Zickel), the one with a wife and son, laments the "over-evolved generation of panty-waists" his tribe has become. To prove his point, his best buds are Craig (Christopher Moynihan, the show's creator), a weepy broken-hearted romantic who's a less funny variation on the guy Jake Johnson plays on Fox's infinitely funnier New Girl; and bearded ball of sputtering impotent rage Kenny (Dan Fogler), Will's miserably divorced brother-in-law, who's driven to apoplectic new lows by the arrival of his ex's sensitive-hunk boyfriend (NYPD Blue's Henry Simmons, whose New Age-y self-parody is the best thing in the show). When he gets really upset, Kenny reflects on his avatar of coolness to wonder: What Would Tobey Maguire Do?

Change the channel, I'm betting.

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