It's been nearly a year and a half since the last season of Hemlock Grove. And since every episode of the Netflix drama is filled with a dozen or so unexpected plot twists and bizarre mysteries, a year and a half can feel like decades where episodic memory is concerned. Since you probably don't have time to re-binge-watch the first two seasons this week, here's everything you need to know before the show returns for its third and final season on Friday:

It's about a gypsy werewolf named Peter (Landon Liboiron) and a vampire-like upir named Roman (Bill Skarsgard), who have ridiculous sexual tension. But they're just really close bros and totally straight.


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Roman's sister Shelley (Madeline Martin) looks like a monster, but she is actually really sweet. Very few people know that though, since they believe she murdered a bunch of young women. In reality, a young vargulf (a mentally unstable werewolf) named Christina (Freya Tingley) ate the girls because she wanted to punish them for being sexually promiscuous.

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Christina also ate Roman's face off, but love brought him back to life.

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Roman's mother Olivia (Famke Janssen) put Roman under a hypnotic spell and made him rape his cousin - who was actually his half-sister - Letha (Penelope Mitchell). She became convinced she had gotten pregnant by an angel.

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Letha gave birth to a daughter, Nadia, but died during childbirth. Her boyfriend at the time, Peter, was inconsolable.

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Peter also talks about his balls a lot.

After her car crashes near Roman's house, new girl Miranda (Madeline Brewer) winds up moving in with him. When she finds Nadia in a locked room, she starts lactating and becomes the baby's surrogate mother. Also, at one point she starts lactating blood.

An extremist faction of The Order of the Dragon, an ancient organization of supernatural hunters, comes to Hemlock Grove and begins hunting Nadia under the impression that she could start the apocalypse. But Roman and Peter slay the cultists before they get to her.


Olivia, who became an upir centuries ago after cutting off her vestigial tail, was once held captive by the Order in Paris in 1884. She was eventually released by the Chancellor under the agreement that she would be monitored and had to convince other upirs to self-regulate their feeding. She didn't completely follow through on her promise, but what can you do?

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Olivia also had a daughter a long time ago with Dmitri, a slave who, despite Olivia's love for him, abandoned and robbed her when she was 13. Olivia gave up the child, Magdalena, into slavery.

Roman hated being a monster, so he worked with Dr. Pryce (Joel De La Fuente), the family's mad scientist with super strength, on a treatment to turn him human again. But before he could complete his treatment, he had to go save Nadia.

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Norman (Dougray Scott) and Sheriff Chasseur (Demore Barnes), who works for the Order of the Dragon, were both trying to kill Olivia. But when Norman finds out Olivia has terminal cancer, he decides to let her live because a slow, painful death would be worse than a quick one.

Olivia eventually rips Norman's heart from his body. But not before Norman admits to Roman that he's actually his father and not his brother, JR.


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Dr. Pryce grows a new body for Shelley and they transfer her consciousness into it. However, Olivia eats the new Shelley to cure her cancer. Norman and Dr. Pryce are able to revive Shelley, but she was upset because she hadn't wanted to live if it was in her old body.

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Peter's cousin Destiny (Tiio Horn) is a psychic. She's also dating another werewolf Andreas (Luke Camilleri), who casually killed a man to stop Peter from becoming a vargulf.


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Miranda discovers that the local pediatrician, Dr. Spivak (J.C. MacKenzie), orchestrated her arrival in Hemlock Grove and her relationship with Nadia because of her blood type. According to Spivak, Miranda's milk production has allowed Nadia to "triple her ovum output." Miranda also learns that Nadia can make people's heads explode.


She decides that the only thing to do is kill herself and Nadia by jumping off the White Tower. But as they're falling to their death, they're snatched up by a flying lizard man that is Dr. Spivak's true form.


So that's (most of) what happened in the first two seasons of Hemlock Grove. Any questions? Well, you'll just have to wait until Season 3 to find out the answers. But no guarantees they'll make a lick of sense.