Yeah, we know. After months of blasting the "hit song" of the summer in the car, in the gym and at home, it feels like having to listen to the ubiquitous "Call Me Maybe" one more time could drive someone over the edge. But what if instead of Carly Rae Jepsen's vocals, it was Rachel Berry (Lea Michele) singing a slowed-down arrangement as she explores the single life in New York?
Glee has recycled the most overplayed and stale pop songs to great success for three seasons, whether it be the Warblers' a capella take on Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream" or the New Directions' first group performance of the karaoke staple "Don't Stop Believin'." So who's to say the glee clubbers can't achieve the same success with the current must-have songs of the summer? We examined the best and brightest offerings from Top 40 radio to offer the show's writing staff a few friendly suggestions for the new season. You're welcome!
"Boyfriend" by Justin Bieber: Rachel has loved Finn (Cory Monteith) for how many years? So when her new possible love interest Brody (Dean Geyer) tries to win her over, the lyrics of this recent Biebs hit just might do the trick.
"Call Me Maybe" by Carly Rae Jepsen: Speaking of Rachel trying to move on, we can imagine she'd feel quite guilty about giving away her digits for the first time to a new guy, which is why we could see her singing a slowed-down acoustic version of Jepsen's summer smash.
"Scream" by Usher: Sure, this song is technically about the act that happens between two people after dancing, but we could easily picture Rachel's tough new teacher (played by Kate Hudson) singing this at the top of her lungs during a particularly grueling NYADA class. Water break, anyone?
"Payphone" by Maroon 5 ft. Wiz Khalifa: Blaine (Darren Criss) has been known to work his way around a bubblegum pop song (See: "Raise Your Glass" and "Last Friday Night"), which makes this the perfect tune for him to sing after he and Kurt (Chris Colfer) break up. Come on, you know it's going to happen. Kurt doesn't need any more distractions while trying to make his way to New York.
"Take Care" by Drake ft. Rihanna: Since ditching her dreamy dentist husband (we hardly knew ye, John Stamos), Emma (Jayma Mays) has made major progress in dealing with her obsessive-compulsive disorder in no small part thanks to Mr. Schue (Matthew Morrison). But she's still a long way from being fully healed of her old bad habits, which is why we can just picture Will serenading her with this radio staple in her time of need.
"Some Nights" by fun.: After giving Rachel his blessing to go to New York, Finn enlisted in the military to honor his father's memory. Though he's serving his country, surely it won't be as easy as he expected. This fun. tune would be fitting for Finn and his new platoon to sing while going through basic training.
"Where Have You Been" by Rihanna: If Will can use a Rihanna song (and some very slick synchronized swimming moves) to propose marriage to Emma, why can't Sue (Jane Lynch) break out into this auto-tuned piece of pop perfection when she first experiences the love of motherhood for herself? Aww!
"Everybody Talks" by Neon Trees: Puck (Mark Salling) cemented his status as a baby-making, teacher-seducing, all-around badass at McKinley High before he left for more pool-friendly pastures. So you just know Lima's under-18 set will be buzzing when his little brother, Jake (Jacob Artist), walks the halls for the first time, which makes this rock song perfect to introduce him.
"Drive By" by Train: It's been a long time since Artie (Kevin McHale) and Tina (Jenna Ushkowitz) were anything more than friends and glee club partners, but now that Tina's ab-tastic boyfriend Mike Chang (Harry Shum) is heading out of town on a dance scholarship, who's to say the new seniors couldn't reconnect, especially if Artie performs this tune for her?
"Wide Awake" by Katy Perry: Sure, Quinn (Dianna Agron) recovered quickly from her car accident — she was even dancing by the finale! — and she still went off to Yale, but life may not be all that perfect once she's out of little Lima, Ohio. Here's hoping she has an eye-opening experience at school so she can sing this ditty while using her handy-dandy Metro North pass to visit once-enemy-turned-friend Rachel in New York.
"Blow Me (One Last Kiss)" by Pink: As evidenced by a recent photo, Santana (Naya Rivera) won't be heading to the bright lights of New York just yet. Before then, she'll try out her cheerleading scholarship at the University of Louisville. But how long will she really last? We give it three episodes before she's blowing one last kiss to the school and heading to NYC while belting this Pink tune, natch.
"Wild Ones" by Flo Rida ft. Sia: Naturally, Jake will fill his half-brother Puck's role as the resident bad boy at McKinley, attracting all sorts of women who will serenade him with Sia's smooth chorus from this summer hit.
"Give Your Heart a Break" by Demi Lovato: Thanks to Sam (Chord Overstreet) posting Mercedes' (Amber Riley) performance of "Disco Inferno" online, she will be Los-Angeles-bound after being signed as a backup singer. Since Trouty Mouth has one year left to go still, we could see a flashback to Mercedes saying farewell to her love and trying to give him some closure while she's across the country.
Which songs do you want to hear this season? Glee returns Thursday, Sept. 13 at 9/8c on Fox.