<EM>Battle of the Network Reality Stars</EM> Battle of the Network Reality Stars

I was glad Angel didn't give up on this show until the night the actual dancing began. And then I sat through over half an hour of "getting to know everyone's sob story" without even the benefit of "lyrical" choreography. By the way, I'm not alone in being baffled by that category of dance. My sister Gabrielle, a dancer for 14 years, hadn't heard of it either. "It looks like modern," she shrugged. She actually called me from Florida in the middle of Ryan and Melissa's mambo because, well, they suddenly made the show worth talking about. Neither of them had much experience in the genre, and everyone was worried about Ryan's hedgehog hair getting in the way, but they totally pulled it off like pros. Dan's weird summation of the performance as "badass" led to the quote of the night from Nigel: "Nothing touches a badass?" And as much as I want to hate selfish Blake, he and Destini were totally in their element and made all that rolling on the floor actually evocative. Maybe it was due to the unoriginal choreography, but the jive performers, Jamile and Ashle and Craig and Melody, didn't wow me so much. I'd also blame the bland hip-hop routine for the fact that I couldn't remember a thing about Nick and Kamilah's number just seconds after they finished. As for the bottom six: Allan can move and I really like his style, but he's a one-trick pony; Snow's got such good footwork it's a shame she relies on all those weird fringy costumes to show some flair; Jonnis looks uncomfortable doing anything but his floppy-shirt, floppy-hair wiggle number; Michelle was decent in the mambo, but her solo gymnastic-stripper dance (don't tell me that was belly-dancing) was too silly; Artem looks mighty fine to me but needs to stop showing off that chest for a minute and step up his technique for those judges; and Sandra is absolutely adorable, though adorable might not be the adjective one wants in a serious pro. One final word: Will someone please find a jacket that fits Dan?