You gotta hand it to Rory. She played Logan, and without even realizing it. The minute she told him she wanted to go back to being friends, the pretty playboy with "a hundred girls on speed dial" offered up commitment. (Though the cynic in me wonders if deep down Rory knew the rich boy would want what he couldn't have. 'Cause that girl sure ain't stupid.) I've never hidden the fact that I'm not a big Logan fan, so I wasn't all that impressed. But I do have to give him credit for returning to Rory after his parents roasted her at dinner. I figured he'd make it half way through that cell phone before the night was over. (I had to laugh when Logan's mother insisted Lorelai wasn't the reason Rory wasn't good enough for Logan. So this moneyed hoity-toity society gal has no problem with a woman who turned her back on her moneyed hoity-toity family as a teenager to raise a child alone out of wedlock? Riiiiight.) If you ask me, Logan's the one with a lot to prove, not Rory. Though I am sure she won't be feeling that way once she starts her newspaper internship with Logan's dad. I can read the headline now: "Trouble Ahead for Gilmore Girl." But really, the most important moment of the evening was the fabulous guest appearance by TV Guide's own Michael Ausiello. In case you missed it, he was the one reading a book in the corner of the Dragonfly Inn when Luke and Lorelai had it out over Sookie's wacky meddling. His hasty retreat had Emmy written all over it. Way to go, Michael! Robin Honig
God bless Inside TV magazine! Since my colleagues and I were off loving each other not that way at the launch party for the Guide's splashy new weekly (on stands now, FYI), I had to tape this one. Which mercifully allowed me to fast-forward through the blahblahblah of the pre-filmed visits to the gang's hometowns. Don't get me wrong, crying siblings and proud girlfriends are a beautiful thing, and I so need to meet Mama Maroulis, but let's not forget what we're here for, OK? It's all about the performances. And I gotta say, the kids did aiiight picking tunes from the last five years. As did their parents. So let's send out some props to the moms and pops of our final six. Y'all should be proud.
Carrie Underwood: I don't get it. Country girl is totally in her Grand Ole element with this Martina McBride number, but I'm more into figuring out if that's Liv Tyler's hateful sister in the audience. Great vocals, sure. Just super safe.
Bo Bice: Hot: Gavin DeGraw's "I Don't Wanna Be" gave Bogart one of his best nights so far. The applause alone proved that. Not: It's also the killer theme song of the unacceptably underappreciated One Tree Hill, and I completely flaked on recording tonight's "fresh" episode. Gotta get me one of them there TiVo doohickeys. Damn.
Vonzell Solomon: Even if a few of the low notes were rough, I'm with Randawg on Baby V's rendition of Christina Aguilera's "I Turn To You." Girlfriend sang it. Now is it weird that I want to hug her?
Anthony Fedorov: How odd that Clay Aiken is in the hizzy for blondie's strongest performance in weeks? And on Celine Dion's "I Surrender," no less! Hmm. While I ponder this convergence of adult-oriented pop mojo, you can all work on why Heather "Heavy Metal Husbands" Locklear was there rooting for my Keystone State comrade.
Constantine Maroulis: Poor guy. Not only does he get those underwhelming reactions from Simon and Randy, he's also got to keep that smile plastered on while Paula yammers on about him being the one Idol who can do something, or be someone or go somewhere. I don't know. She lost me after her eyes started rolling back. Anyway, I hope that teaches him never to do Nickelback's "How You Remind Me" again. It's just not worth the aggravation. Plus, the song pretty much sucks anyway.
The last guy: I told you, I won't say his name until it's followed by "...is outta here!" Though based on Simon's "pack your bags" assessment of his bloodless take on the Luther Vandross snoozer, "Dance with My Father," I may be screaming it from the rafters in a few hours. And then later on, as I perform a tribal Idol happy dance in front of Karen, my physical therapist's Savol-ating secretary. Damian J. Holbrook
(Can't get enough American Idol? Watch Kimberly Caldwell and Rosanna Tavarez dish about the music on Idol Chat, Thursdays at 8 pm/ET on TV Guide Channel. Catch a video preview of the show here.)
The Amazing Race
Was I the only one cackling like a hyena on weed when Rob was (once again) bad-mouthing the other teams, who, unbeknownst to him, were now ahead of his elite foursome? Oh man, that was awesome. Rob actually outsmarted himself this time. If he had just kept his big boastful mouth shut, Uchenna wouldn't have looked into other flights to Turkey and found an earlier connection. Ha, ha, ha! Wait, one more... Ha! (I'd like to point out, for all you Rob and Amber fans out there, that if this had happened by chance, I wouldn't have enjoyed this turn of events nearly as much. Well, I wouldn't have cackled anyway.) Reality television doesn't get much better than this.
And was I also the only one who audibly gasped when it was decided that Gretchen would be the one to climb that rope ladder and rappel down the fortress? "A 66-year-old lady," she said, "shouldn't be doing things like this." But she did it. Wow. I suddenly feel so lazy and sedentary, I can't stand it.
Finally, as I mentioned last week, I waited to go off on Kelly's mind-boggling comments about Ron's military service until I saw the whole thing in context. As predicted, it didn't get much better. Here's the full sequence as broadcast:
Kelly: Your patterns in life show that you don't make commitments.
Ron: You're right, I was only committed to the military...
Kelly: And you got out of that one.
Ron: How did I get out of that one?
Kelly: By being a P.O.W., you left your commitment early.
Ron: Oh yeah... What I did was I crashed myself. I went through hell and torture so that I could get out of the Army early. I almost died, but I knew I was getting out of the Army early if I survived it.
And then Kelly still didn't say anything in response (at least that we saw). She just sat there smugly as Ron pointed out the idiocy of what she had just uttered. (I couldn't have said it better myself.) Well, it's safe to say that when they eventually do their round of interviews after they've won or been eliminated she'll be doing some major explaining for this. Have fun. Danny Spiegel
Somebody, please, please, please tell me that Logan is not the guy who drugged and raped Veronica. I am totally crushing on the mildly reformed bad boy now, and getting info like that might be unforgivable. I really don't want to hate him. But if he just handed out the drugs or something of that ilk, I could accept that, eventually. Especially after that heartbreaking scene of him downing the champagne he had popped open for his yachting date with Miss Mars, which occured only days after their sexy mirror-steaming encounter in the girls' room. I just love the I-want-to-hate-you-and-kiss-you-all-at-the-same-time tension between them. Besides, with P.I. Daddy gettin' it on with Wallace's mom and starting to think about divorcing absentee Mrs. Mars, Logan's pop being all focused on the family after his wife's suicide and the oh-so-charming Tad blackmailing Carmen, this show needs a somewhat functional relationship.
In other Neptune news, Clarence Weidman found Veronica's bug-ridden plant and threatened Mrs. Fennel's job. Guess that means Wallace and Veronica can avoid the inevitable stepsibling rivalry for a little while longer. And does anyone know how much a disposable cell phone costs? Because the less-than-wealthy V uses them like tissues and I'm thinking they can't be that cheap. And I know her dad was planning on using the 50-grand Duncan Kane finders fee to send the spunky sleuth to an Ivy League school, but if she keeps giving out eight percent of the bounty booty to everyone that helps her out, she might have to look into community college. Angel Cohn
Oh, sweet torture, Cameron is making eyes at House, and there he is, that loveable curmudgeon, telling her to get out of his face... oh, wait. It's a repeat damn!
So this woman is hearing voices, inanimate objects talking to her. Ooh, ooh, I've seen this one before! It's called Wonderfall's syndrome, right? If so, the prognosis isn't good. She'll be lucky to make it past midseason. Nope, I'm wrong. It's Wilson's disease. I knew it started with a W. Her body is accumulating too much copper, which on the plus side gives her some pretty copper-colored rings around her corneas. The downside, of course, is that she hears voices. Oooh, that gives me an idea! House should pay a visit to Joan of Arcadia, maybe she has Wilson's disease and could be treated with the right drugs. Then again, if it's Wonderfalls syndrome... I'm not sure there's much that can be done. Dan Roberts
Poor, poor Vic. For once he decides to keep his nose clean. No bribes, no skimming a few grand from a drug bust (or 12 million from the Armenian mob) he's just trying to clean up the streets and be a good cop. And what does he get? Death-wish Dutch is trying to bang his wife, his best friend Shane has agreed to exchange Vic's corpse for a dead teenager's, the new captain who put his career on life support is now threatening to pull the plug, and his former captain is on a mission to destroy him at all costs! Paradoxically, the only person who doesn't want a piece of Vic this season is Claudette but she's been down that road before.
Still, I don't feel sorry for Vic any more than I'd feel sorry for a wolverine backed into a corner. You saw how he handled those Russians even though he was technically off the case. When the fur starts flying and mark my words, it will Mackey will no doubt emerge from the carnage covered in blood and hungry for more. What, you think he can't handle Shane?! Just watch. And how long before Vic discovers Aceveda's little fetish-for-hire friend? Who's gonna be twisting in the wind then? As for Rawling, there's still a thread of mutual respect there. Let's just hope it holds, because without her support, he's screwed.
No, the two people with the most to fear are Antwon and Dutch. Antwon's life expectancy dropped the minute Vic learned he'd put a hit on him. And Dutch Boy signed his own death warrant the moment we saw him bouncing Vic's daughter on his knee and trying to hit on Vic's ex. Boys, you both made a bold and unfortunate choice. Good luck with that. DR
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