Question: Dude, we have less than two weeks before the new season of 24. Give me something good or I will tell Jack Bauer that Papa Smurf is a terrorist leader and we all know what'll happen then.

Answer: I'm calling for a moratorium on gratuitous Smurf threats in Ask Ausiello starting right now. I'm all for overdoing a joke until it's within an inch of its life (see also: MIA Network), but c'mon, this one stopped being funny and started being downright cruel and unusual about 10 columns ago. Leave my little blue buddies alone and start picking on a group that actually deserves to be terrorized. Like, say, those annoying wannabe Smurfs, the Snorks.