Question: Did you happen to spend part of your vacation at the Borders store in Harrisburg, Penn., on Nov. 25? If not, your doppelganger was perusing the magazine section.

Answer: So much for my anonymity. Yes, that was definitely me. You should have come over and asked me to pose for a picture or something. At the very least I could have autographed a copy of TV Guide for you while we recalled some of our favorite AA moments. It would have been a blast. (That thing about me trying to retain some semblance of a private life is just something us famous folk say to make ourselves feel important. Pay it no mind.)