Britney Spears by Jamie McCarthy/WireImage.com Britney Spears by Jamie McCarthy/WireImage.com

Britney Spears' latest (and simply sad) antics include a fender-bender, when on Monday her Mercedes dinged a parked station wagon in Los Angeles (embarrassing if only because of the slim odds of colliding into the one station wagon still in existence in L.A.). The pop tart then shrugged off the incident by shouting to the paparazzi, "I'm a brainiac!" The New York Post's Page Six also hears that because Spears flaked out on a photo shoot for her new fragrance, stylist Kylie Cavaco was grabbed to body double for Spears (whose head will be superimposed on the stand-in). "Kylie has the body Brit used to have," a source meows to the tab, "not the one she has now."

Us, meanwhile, reports that Britney recently hooked up with an extra from her video shoot - a 21-year-old college boy - for a night of topless poolside tomfoolery, nonstop necking and (because this is junior high, after all) Truth or Dare.