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GOING, GOING, GONER

Buffyverse ruler Joss Whedon — whose Firefly flick Serenity hits theaters one week from today — has inked a seven-figure deal with Universal to write and direct the fantasy thriller Goner. "It's the story of a young woman's journey that involves a great deal of horror and some heroics," he tells Variety. "It's certainly darker than Serenity, and there are a lot of left turns along the way. It is something I had in mind for a while, and it just poured out of me when I finished my film." Of course, Goner will have to wait until Whedon finishes Warner Bros.' big-screen Wonder Woman flick and (hopefully) gets the ball rolling on that long-rumored Spike TV movie (hint hint, nudge nudge, slap slap).

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