Today's News: Our Take


DON'T MESS WITH THESE TWO

Hercules and Xena are teaming up to battle a new enemy: Universal Studios. Kevin Sorbo and Lucy Lawless are suing the company behind their syndicated shows for breach-of-contract. They claim Universal denied them their fair share of the profits. read more

FriendsAfter 10 years, I've finally...

Friends After 10 years, I've finally had enough of Ross and Rachel. Cars wear out in less time than these two have taken to figure out if they will or if they won't. Again. And a drunk Ross is not funny, just more obnoxious. But it was nice to be reunited with Giovanni Ribisi, who does a winning Gen-X Jim Ignatowski as Phoebe's oddball brother Frank.

Survivor: Pearl Islands In a virtual rerun of last week's events, Drake won both challenges and took Morgan's water pot. Speaking of challenges, was I the only one creeped out by that Cirque du Soleil immunity challenge? As predicted, Lil got the boot.

Scrubs Sarah Chalke, whom I've almost forgiven for her clueless stint on Roseanne, hires Heather Locklear's stylists and hooks up with Scott Foley. The show's clever and quirky, but the real reason to tune in is the riotously acerbic snarkmeister John C. McGinley. Anyone who's seen read more

REGRETS, HE HAS SOME

Arnold Schwarzenegger responded Thursday to a potentially-damaging Los Angeles Times story that quotes six women as saying the actor-turned-gubernatorial candidate groped them on movie sets and other places over the last three decades. "Yes, it is true that I was on rowdy movie sets and I have done things that were not right, which I thought then was playful but now I recognize that I offended people," he said during a campaign stop in San Diego. "Those people that I have offended, I want to say to them I am deeply sorry about that and I apologize because that's not what I'm trying to do." He also referred to the Times piece as "trash politics." read more

School of Rock's Drummer Boy


At an open casting call in Chicago, a cute 14-year-old drummer called Kevin Clark was plucked from obscurity and given a co-starring role in Jack Black's new film, School of Rock (opening tomorrow). Though this was his first time on a movie set, the young scene-stealer quickly learned that, in showbiz, looks can be deceiving.

"I'm a freshman in high school, and I play a fifth grader," Clark laughs. "People have seen the sneak preview and said, 'They made you look young.' I sound like Mickey Mouse in the movie and my voice is really high."

He took part in more Hollywood magic during the film's musical numbers. Clark and the other kids played their own instruments, but pre-recorded the song tracks and just pretended to perform during filming. "It is kind of hard to fake playing drums," the energetic teen admits, "because you still have to go full power and show that you are actually playing. But when they did a close-up of the drums, I actual read more

SIMON SAYS... GET DRAMATIC

American Idol judge Simon Cowell is developing an hourlong music-themed drama series for Fox, set at a Los Angeles version of Juilliard, Variety reports. Word is viewers may get a chance to script the show's ending. — Additional reporting by Ben Katner (aka Paradise Hotel addict) read more

BY GEORGE, HE'S BACK!

That whole Bob Patterson debacle isn't stopping Jason Alexander from attempting another sitcom comeback. The Seinfeld alum has struck a deal with CBS to headline a comedy pilot about a sports columnist who juggles career and family. (Hmm... that sounds vaguely familiar.) read more

IN RELATED NEWS...

Just when you thought Rush Limbaugh's week couldn't get any worse, today's New York Daily News reports that the former ESPN pundit is being investigated in Florida for allegedly buying thousands of addictive painkillers from a black-market drug ring. Limbaugh was reportedly turned in by his former housekeeper, who bears a striking resemblance to liberal activist Janeane Garofalo once you remove the clever disguise. read more

THE "ULTIMATE" FINALE

In last night's Paradise Hotel finale, a last-minute switcheroo found the helter-skelter reality "contest" naming Keith and Charla the winners. But even more shocking was that, while our new hero Keith split his jackpot with bed buddy Tara, Charla opted not to share with her besotted sidekick, Dave, who, despite his penchant for lying, never once wavered in his support of her. (Ouch!) Even more shocking was the fact that the big "ultimate prize" host Amanda Byram was always going on about turned out to be a paltry $250,000 each. (Yawn.) But most shocking of all, good guy Keith and Tara invited their tormentors on an all-expenses-paid vacation in Vegas. (What are they, nuts?!) Not shocking at all was the fact that Toni and Co. held onto their titles as the most hypocritical creatures on Earth. read more

HOLLYWOOD P.I.

Former NYPD Blue cop Jimmy Smits has signed on to play a private eye to the stars in an untitled NBC drama pilot. Jerry Bruckheimer (CSI, Without a Trace, Cold Case, etc... ) is producing, so odds are it'll be a big hit. read more

END ZONE

Conservative commentator Rush Limbaugh quit his job at ESPN's Sunday NFL Countdown Wednesday night after his crack about black Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb sparked widespread outrage. "My comments this past Sunday were directed at the media and were not racially motivated," Limbaugh said in a statement. "I offered an opinion. This opinion has caused discomfort to the crew, which I regret." During Sunday's pregame show, Limbaugh said McNabb was overrated because the media "has been very desirous that a black quarterback do well." Democratic presidential candidates Wesley Clark and Howard Dean condemned Limbaugh's remarks, as did the NAACP. (FYI: Back in July, I said Limbaugh would only last "a week" at his new job. He lasted a month. I was wrong — I admit it.) read more

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