Today's News: Our Take


THIS YEAR'S MODEL

Jesus was wrong. He told America's Next Top Model contestant Shannon in a dream that our fave, Elyse, would make the final two, but at halftime of last night's season finale, the future M.D. got eliminated, paving the way for endearing dark-horse candidate Adrianne to come from behind and win a Revlon contract, a Wilhelmina representation deal and a restraining order against judge Janice Dickinson. If you have a question for either Adrianne or Elyse — sorry Shannon, but you're boring — send them to me via the link at the bottom of this column. I'll forward them on to my colleague Daniel "Party Boy" Coleridge, who will be speaking to them later today. read more

BREAKING HER SILENCE

Tomb Raider star Angelina Jolie is speaking out for the first time about her short-lived marriage to Billy Bob Thornton. "We're not friends, no," she tells Barbara Walters on Friday's 20/20. "It's like we just changed, we became very different people, and I wouldn't know what to talk to him about." Here's a suggestion: Are Cruz and Eden the greatest soap super couple ever to grace the tube? Discuss. read more

STRIP SUIT

A former stripper is suing Pamela Anderson and comic book icon Stan Lee, claiming she is the "true creator" of TNN's new animated series Stripperella. Janet Clover alleges that she pitched Lee the idea for Stripperella a year ago during a private dance session. Apparently, she also pitched him a story about a superhero who was half man, half spider. read more

Seven Silly Questions for Johnny Bravo

Filmmaker Spike Lee may have given TNN the green light to rebrand itself Spike TV, but the case will likely pave the way for similar lawsuits in the future. Case in point: Johnny Bravo — Cartoon Network's ego-trippin' Elvis type — is considering a lawsuit against the TV network that shares his name.


TV Guide Online: Do you think you have a case?
Bravo:
Are you kidding? Bravo's got Bravo written all over it! I mean, they might as well change the name of The It Factor to Who Wants To Be Johnny Bravo?

TVGO: What tipped you off that Bravo might be taking advantage of your image to attract viewers?
Bravo:
When that [James] Lipton guy started wearing sunglasses and calling his female guests "hot mamas."

TVGO: Spike Lee hired Johnny Cochran as his attorney. You're goi read more

SIMON SAYS... SHOW ME THE CASH!

Here's further proof that it does in fact pay to be brutally honest: Simon Cowell — who had previously insisted his days as American Idol's evil judge were over — has inked a lucrative new pact with Fox that includes three more annual Idol contests. In addition, the deal — reportedly worth north of $10 million — gives the biting Brit a hefty pay raise and his very own production company at Fox. And to avoid ruffling feathers, rumor has it the network will grant Paula Abdul's demand for free two-hour parking with validation. read more

SAVAGE REMARKS

Last month's Supreme Court ruling legalizing gay sex seems to have pushed conservative talk show host Michael Savage over the edge. MSNBC fired Savage on Monday after he referred to a caller as a "sodomite" and said he should "get AIDS and die." A rep for the struggling cable network told The Associated Press that Savage's "comments were extremely inappropriate and the decision was an easy one." read more

I SMELL A COMEBACK

Winona Ryder has made off with major roles in two new films. The recovering shoplifter will star opposite Sean Connery and Klaus Maria Brandauer in director Milos Forman's upcoming love triangle drama Embers. Ryder is also attached to play the title role in Robert Altman's World War II saga The Widow Claire. read more

Kelsey Grammer Smells a Rat


If we didn't know better, we'd say Kelsey Grammer had an objection to the legal profession. How else to explain his new TNN series Gary the Rat, about a rodent who works as a Big Apple attorney. "I think anyone that's ever lived or worked in Hollywood has had a bad run-in with a lawyer," laughs the Frasier star, who voices the title character and serves as a producer. "Unfortunately, the stereotype about [lawyers] is not very favorable, so we thought we'd take advantage of that and use it for the good of entertainment."

Grammer's opinion of legal types was hardly enhanced by a New York judge's recent decision to grant filmmaker Spike Lee an injunction preventing TNN from renaming itself Spike TV. (Late yesterday, Lee settled, giving TNN permission to use the Spike TV name.) "I think read more

ASHTON UPDATE

In yesterday's column, I asked you, my loyal readers, to help me come up with a third reason why Ashton Kutcher's decision to stick with That '70s Show should come as a surprise. Well, congrats to Cathy, who hit the nail on the head when she wrote, "It's highly unlikely Demi Moore would encourage re-upping on a TV show." Cath gets extra props for using the word "re-upping" in a sentence. read more

J.R. RETURNS!

SoapNet has acquired all 13 seasons of Dallas, to begin airing weekdays beginning Sept. 8. I'll ask again: What about Santa Barbara?!?! read more

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