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The Long Weekend

[2005, Movie, R, 90 mins]

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Gross-out gags plus home-movie mishaps and icky footage of animals committing unnatural acts add up to lowest-common denominator comedy coproduced by Vin Di Bona Productions, purveyors of America's Funniest Home Videos. Ed Waxman spent his childhood filming everything from his older brother Cooper's teenage theater performances to family dog Mr. Fiddlesticks fouling the lawn, carefully editing the results and storing them on hundreds of neatly labeled cassettes. As an adult, up-and-coming advertising executive Ed (Brendan Fehr) is well on the way to mature adulthood — he's living with his beautiful girlfriend, Cathy (Nicole McKay), and has a hotshot gig as an advertising executive — while big brother Cooper (Chris Klein) is an unemployed actor. Then Cooper gets a lucrative contract endorsing a Japanese rice whiskey and Ed has a meltdown after catching Cathy in bed with another man; adding insult to injury, she's taping her infidelity with Ed's video camera. Ed vows never to shoot another piece of real-life footage, but going cold turkey sends his brain into replay mode, churning up gross images at the worst possible moments. The brothers move in together, and as Cooper's fortunes continue to rise, Ed's stock at work sinks: His only chance to save his job is to come up with a campaign that will keep the agency's biggest client, Great Bridge Insurance, from decamping. Ed has one weekend in which to do it, the same weekend Cooper has vowed to get his brother into the sack with a hot girl. Over the course of a long, humiliating 48 hours, Ed manages to expose two unsuspecting women to his porn collection; accidentally talk dirty — really, truly dirty — to a little girl; impersonate a priest at the funeral of a supermodel (a macabre cameo by Evangeline Lilly of TV's Lost); get himself and Cooper thrown out of a strip joint called "Hot Buttered Bitches"; hit on a racist at a laundromat; embarrass himself in front of a gym bunny; set a barfly's hair on fire; unwittingly go home with a prostitute; and nearly get raped in jail by a black-market Viagra dealer. In between, he manages to meet the new love of his life (Cobie Smulders) under mortifying circumstances. The film's juvenile but R-rated sense of humor, heavily weighted in the direction of excretion, flatulence and shots of animal genitals, is aimed squarely at potty-brained 12-year-olds over the age of 17. All others, be warned. --Maitland McDonagh

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