Imagine the result avant-garde filmmaker Jim Jarmusch were to direct an Ed McBain police procedural, and you'll get an idea of the comic moxie displayed by this TNT basic-cable movie. While collaring small-time punks like Freshy (James Villemaire), FBI agent Cuthbert Gibbons (Colm Meaney) must rein in his hot-tempered partner, Mike Tozzi (Chris Noth, on the flipside of his dour detective Mike Logan of Law & Order). Because he's the cousin of Cuthbert's overprotective wife, Lorraine (Mercedes Ruehl), Mike tries to impress his relative-by-marriage on the job. While they investigate loan sharks, Mike discovers he has something in common with a loose cannon Mafioso named Tommy "Bells" Bellavita (Robert Patrick): They both have the hots for Freshy's sister, Gina (Dagmara Dominczyk). Forcing Freshy to turn informer, Mike and Cuthbert hope to ensnare Bells in a sting that will lead to his boss, Buddha Stanzione (Elliott Gould). When an unknown assailant ices an undercover officer, the evidence implicates Bells, because he starts spending the victim's counterfeit payoff. Already in trouble with Buddha, Bells draws unnecessary attention by shooting Cuthbert in the course of kidnapping Mike and Gina. Fortunately, Cuthbert was wearing a bulletproof vest; unfortunately, his solicitous wife refuses to leave his side. Even when her hubby visits Buddha's headquarters, Lorraine sticks to Cuthbert and gives her own here-s-what-you-oughta-do advice. After Mike and Gina escape their confinement, Bells chases them from New Jersey to the Staten Island Ferry. Buddha, Cuthbert, Lorraine, and Freshy pick up the scent. Slowed down by goofball gangsters, Cuthbert must reach Mike and Gina before Bells does.
Serving as both producer and leading man, Noth takes a back seat to the priceless supporting cast, who propel this black comedy. Wiseguys and feds become strange bedfellows in a zany caper film about shifting alliances.
Watch for comedian Jim Gaffigan as a white-bread hood with the same odd nickname as a South Park character. --Robert Pardi
