Neil Patrick Harris, Sarah Palin
15. Worst Reveal: After five head-scratching hours of AMC's The Prisoner, we learn that The Village basically exists inside the brain of Two's wife back in the real world. After Two's son, 11-12, kills his mom and hangs himself, a distraught Two (aka Mr. Curtis) convinces Six and the rest of the villagers that Six is the new leader and 313 is the dreamer whose brain will keep the utopia alive. So Six is No. 1? Wait, he's dressed like Two? Oh, who cares really?
14. Best Reveal: How does Sons of Anarchy top Gemma's announcement that she's been raped? A guilt-ridden Tig tells Opie how and why Donna was killed. In a satisfying twist, a raging Opie shows mercy on Stahl and vows to keep the secret from the other brothers for the sake of the club.
13. Least Sincere Invitation: After vigorous prompting by Oprah Winfrey, Sarah Palin concedes that...
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Glee, Brad Paisley
There were a lot of surprises on TV this week. We learned that The Chief is a secret drinker who has fallen off the wagon on Grey's Anatomy. Dexter killed an innocent man. On 90210, Jackie threw Silver the birthday party of a lifetime — and then gave her a surprise of a different sort. And Glee's Sue Sylvester made us see something deeper about the emotional terrorist in a track suit. Welcome to Top Moments: Surprise Party Edition.
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Morris Chestnut, Brian Williams
This week, TV was filled with surprise appearances. Tommy returned on Brothers & Sisters. Rihanna spoke about ex Chris Brown. The JFK assassination was front and center on Mad Men. Kate Hudson distracted Fox cameramen during the World Series. And the pilot episode of V taught us that appearances can deceive. Welcome to this week's Top Moments: Screen Time Edition.
10. Worst Return: Guess who's back on Brothers & Sisters? Prodigal son Tommy, who we last saw abandon his family to join a hippie commune in Mexico. What's he up to now? ...
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Jon Hamm and Kayla Ewell
This week demonstrated that not everyone on TV is cynical. Mad Men's Don Draper finally came clean with his wife. A One Tree Hill investigation uncovered a cruel deception. Amazing Race's Mika had a panic attack. And it would take a real cynic to think that Shepard Smith wasn't being real in calling for more balance in Fox News Channel's political coverage. This Halloween, we're removing our masks and embracing genuine human emotion. Welcome to Top Moments: Cynicism-Free Edition.
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House, Mad Men
There were a lot of dirty tricks on TV this week. Jo Reynolds (Daphne Zuniga) cajoled poor Riley into posing topless on Melrose Place. House and Foreman conducted an autopsy on a living person. Gossip Girl's Chuck kissed a guy because of Blair's deception. CSI: Miami's Eric Delko tricked us all by slinking off into the night with barely any explanation. Welcome to this week's Top Moments: Dirty Tricks Edition.
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Tina Fey, Katherine Heigl
This week TV made us feel things. Trauma panicked us with a disgruntled employee shooting at his co-workers. Modern Family made us squirm and laugh with an off-color wedding toast. The contestants of The Amazing Race made us feel smart. And the idea of a little boy in a balloon crashing to his death made us all hold our breath and pray for his safety... and then puke. Welcome to this week's Top Moments: Funny Feelings Edition.
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Pam Beesly and Paris Hilton
Let's face it: TV this week was pretty disgusting. On Heroes, Sylar crawled out of his grave and back from the dead — a development that made us disgusted with the show's writers. A sense of moral outrage accompanied the news that Chase killed an African dictator on House. Paris Hilton made us feel shame for liking her, and then got graphically beheaded on Supernatural. The Office elevated a pregnancy cliché — morning sickness — to high comedy art. South Park made us rethink Mexican cuisine. And Madonna and Lady Gaga made a gross display of themselves on SNL. Welcome to this week's Top Moments: Profound Disgust Edition.
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Teri Hatcher, David Letterman
The girls can't help it! Just ask Peggy Olson, who succumbed to the oily charms of Duck Phillips. Or Kristin Cavallari, who celebrated her debut on The Hills by launching a full-scale flirting offensive on her frenemy's ex. Or Katherine Mayfair, who might have acted out a tad when her fiancé dumped her to return to his ex-wife. Or Madonna, whose filthy double entendres made not-that-innocent David Letterman blush. Why should guys have all the fun? Amirite, chicas? Throw your hands in the air like you just don't care and check out all the lady drama in this week's Top Moments: Girls Behaving Badly Edition.
12. Grossest Hookup: On Mad Men, Peggy turns down Duck Phillips' job offer, but gets turned on by his very graphic pick-up line: "I want to take you into that bedroom, lock the door, throw you on the bed, take off your clothes with my teeth and give you...
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Mad Men, Glee
What's with all the fancy footwork this week? Everywhere we looked was a podiatrist's dream. Jason Witten's foot allowed the Giants to score (sort of), Macy Gray's feet failed to impress the judges on Dancing with the Stars, Kurt's feet channeled Beyonce in preparation for, um, joining the football team on Glee and poor Guy MacKendrick's foot is gone, and, in Mad Men's world, that means he'll never be able to work (or golf) ever again. While we sink our tired tootsies into a nice Epsom-salt bath, please enjoy this week's Top Moments: Foot Fetish Edition.
11. Best Foot Forward Award: Talk about being in the right place at the right time. After a pass from Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo bounced off Jason Witten's hand and then his left heel, New York Giants safety Kenny Phillips caught the ball and took it all the way to the promised land in one of the most insane interceptions ever. Alas...
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Kanye West, True Blood
This was not a good week for Emily Post, as the week's top TV moments exhibited an alarming lack of etiquette. Kanye West crushed tender flower Taylor Swift's hopes and dreams by barging in on her VMA moment. Serena Williams unleashed a tirade of four-letter words at the U.S. Open. And True Blood's Maryann was in serious need of a wedding planner, as her Dionysian bachelorette party offended our delicate sensibilities. Welcome to Top Moments, Common Courtesy Edition.
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