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April 11, 2007: 1-900-Lucky

The show opened with a scene from Debbie Does Dallas, a movie about cheerleaders. Actually, it's a much deeper story than that. Get it? OK, it's nearly 1 am here in the smokey little hamlet of Los Angeles and I'm knackered (a new word I learned from my friend upon her return from merry olde England). So, try to just laugh at my jokes out of kindness, if nothing else.

This show marked the return of Allison's TV brother Michael and her real live brother, David Arquette, who directed the ep. Ryan Hurst played Michael and I always like when he's around, because he's a great character and you never know what will happen when your siblings appear out of nowhere.

Another reason I loved this ep - Cindy Pickett. (Yes, she does look a lot like Markie Post - remember Night Court?) I have loved Cindy since way back when she was on Guiding Light in the mid '50s. OK, not really that far back, but a long time ago. Most people know her as Ferris Bueller's mother in that quintessential high-school film of the same name. Also, the guy who played her dead husband, please help me with his name. He is fantastic and always plays that ultimate sleazy guy so well.

Michael set up shop as a telephone psychic whose name sounded an awful lot like Cylon (I am still mourning Battlestar Galactica's season end). I think it was Psy-lon. Again, if anyone can shed some light, please do. Psychic Michael had some very funny lines, including the response to Mrs. King's admission of her husband's demise, "He's dead." Michael, "Well, that's not good."

We got to see Scanlon, so I can go to sleep a happy woman. He had three minutes of airtime, which normally wouldn't be enough for me, but it's late.

We also had the return of the Bridge. When Ariel moved away from the car and left Bridge standing there I actually screamed, "Is that a skull and crossbones on her shirt?" and had to rewind and watch it again. Fantastic. Whoever is doing the wardrobe for this child - that's an Emmy waiting to happen. Then Bridgette's face got all tightened up and she pursed her lips, and I was sold. She could sell me frogs dropping from the sky.

Funniest moment for me was when Allison brought Michael over to the Kings' house for the first time. Mrs. King saw him and fell into his arms sobbing, and Allison gave out this very audible sigh. Perfect timing, Patricia! Good direction, David. I love the Arquette family. When are they getting Rosanna on the show?

The story was none too hard to figure out, but still enjoyable. I really liked the subplot with Bridgette and Mrs. Ueberschaer. You knew that pointed nosed, pulled-back-hair bitty had done it! At least I did. And when you have psychic children in your household, should you ever question their dreams? How often is Allison wrong? She's got a pretty good spot-on rating. It's in the genes, for goodness sake.

So the sleazy husband tried to discredit his son - and his girlfriend, for that matter, by seducing the latter in a scene out of something on HBO. I'm putting my foot down. That was a little too much skin, if you ask me. That girl was about to fall out of that bra, which was not nearly big enough to support her undercarriage. And when she climbed on Mr. King in the first place, I could see the junk inside her trunk. Patricia, tell your brother to get a grip. David, control yourself. We've heard about the problems with Courteney, but really. Please take your fantasies to cable. We are family people here.

So it was no surprise to hear "We Are Family" by Sister Sledge as the outro music. See ya next week!
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