February 28, 2007: Hypnotized by Hoochie Magoo
Somewhere in the television universe George Costanza is still yelping about how he always wanted to be an architect. Well, Art Vandelay, meet Oswald Montecristo. For me to equate anything with
Seinfeld should be taken as a sign of the highest respect. And no, Mr. Montecristo, I am not just kissing your butt.
How amazing was that video? Just the fact that they used "Mr. Roboto" to seem cutting edge was evidence of how far off the mark they were, and the "Directed by
Peter Jackson" at the end was the icing on the cake. How much you want to bet Louis added that part in? He strikes me as the only one of that bunch who would have seen
Lord of the Rings.
Oh, Louis "I am their bitch! They are physically superior to me!" Plunk, what a sad, sad intern you are. If you hate dogs (hi, Dad!) that scene was your worst nightmare. If you love dogs, that scene was possibly the greatest thing since
Best in Show. Of course, Louis received two conflicting pieces of advice: Rockefeller's clone of a cousin said, "roll with it," while Gary suggested he should pretend he was on
Jackass. ("It was a TV show about a bunch of mentally ill men who tried to kill themselves each week - absolutely fantastic.") Sadly, nothing worked, though he is still alive.
But of course, Oswald Montecristo couldn't last (and hence, no more mauling scenes, sadly). He's off to build "a building in Beirut for the king of Beirut and will be there for many years." So we won't get anymore of what Ray Romano described as the "gay milkman" outfit. It is nice to know, though, that should I ever want to become an architect, I already have the basics down on the different kinds of Greek columns, even if Jon Stewart doesn't.
Squatch hit the nail on the head, as usual, when he pointed out that Eugene didn't love Kelly... he loved being Oswald and the privileges that came with it. Too bad he wasn't quite up to the task of being a somebody (favorite dish: " apple?"). I'm glad we have regular Eugene back, much as I loved hearing everyone constantly say "Oswald Montecristo."
We've gone from Mick Jagger - is that really over, by the way? I'm a little sad - to Kelly Ripa and now we're on to Ray Romano, who definitely seems like he deserves to get hit by some master criminals. So, as the French and Kelly Ripa say, "bonne chance" to the Knights, and to the rest of you, I hope there are people who are really concerned that you enjoy your lunches.
