Goodman. Len Goodman.
Tonight's dances were chosen at random - ooooohhh! Dun Dun
Dunnnnn! I expect lots of complaining and guffawing will go down when the dances are drawn. I'm doing my best to make this seem like a dramatic twist to the show, but I don't really see it like that. Shouldn't it be that way anyway? It might make the show seem a little less planned. Since we're down to the final four, we're sure to see decent dances tonight so I'm going to try to cut the critique and just pick out the highlights. We all know Marissa doesn't deserve to win or even get past this round, so who needs to hear me say it again? Due to Mario's premature ousting last week, I'm on a hunger strike until order is restored and Marissa is sent packing. So check your fridge for some D-List leftovers because this critic ain't cookin' tonight! Let's just watch the show, shall we?
Jason - After a lecture from Edyta, he got a pep talk from Dan Marino. Fanstastic! Inspiration from someone who had a great career yet never won a super bowl will surely come in handy! If Jason's career ever takes a dive, maybe Dan can get him a job hocking Isotoners. Worst. Gloves. Ever. He has been growing on me, but he sort of lost me on his paso. His fox trot was very smooth but his paso looked choppy. Once again, the judges see something I don't.
Fox Trot 28
Paso Doble 27
Marissa - She got a visit from Stacy Keibler and you just know Tony Bologna was wishing he got to dance with her again because she had legs for days and was very good. Don't believe me? He never got a "lack of body contact" critique with Stacy. Hmmmm. I said above I'd
try to cut the critique, but I can't! Carrie Ann was right, that rumba was not exciting and I thought it was the least sexy rumba ever. What were Bruno and Len thinking? If she gets to the finale I'll go freaking ape shiz!
Quickstep 26
Rumba 26
The Man with the Golden Ten! Len is a huge cranky pants, but I do love him. I especially love when he dances. Even though it's mostly a bit, I like that he takes the time to visit the dancers and work with them. This show would be nothing without him.
Cristián - What was that metallic monstrosity Cheryl was wearing? No one has worn metallic that blinding since Kathleen Turner in
Peggy Sue Got Married. So they picked the ball with the samba and my first thought was that every ball probably had samba on it. The plot thickens! He made it through the waltz and, despite some nerves and concerns, performed an excellent samba. One con: Cheryl's dress was so low in the back I thought I saw a hint of hiney. Not cool.
Viennese Waltz 27
Samba 29
Kristi - After a couple of sub-par weeks (which were oddly still better than most of the competitors), she was back on top with that tango! Len spewed some venom but Carrie Ann shot out of her chair shouting praise so fast she almost lost her dress. That would have been hilarious! I'm sure her jive was awesome but I was so distracted by the hair that was stuck in her mouth it took over my thoughts. I literally kept thinking "oh God, a hair, is it gone, is it still there, is it in her teeth, it stuck to her lip, is it gone,
is it gone, oh my god a hair!" What exactly is the matter with me? I'll never know.
Tango 29
Jive 28
Well despite claiming the top spot once again, Kristi doesn't have it in the bag just yet. Cristián is right on her heels and Jason is just a tad behind them! If there is any justice in this world, this will be the final three. If by some force of sympathy Marissa makes the finals, I shudder to think who will go home! My money would be on Jason since I think Cristián has really been turning it on in recent weeks. Funny what a little ruptured tendon can do! Who do you think is going home? If not Marissa, who? What was your favorite dance tonight? For me it's either Jason's fox trot or Cristián's samba. Please share your thoughts below and stop back tomorrow night in case I need you to talk me off the ledge. See you then!
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