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The Top 6 Revealed!

Ryan opens the show with a warning: Knowing what happened to Michael Johns last week, no one is safe anymore. Thanks, a--hole, we remember that you tortured Michael by telling him no one was kicked off last year during Idol Gives Back - and then you kicked him off! OK, I know it wasn't "you," Ryan, but still, did you have to do it in such a douche-y way?

The Idols sing Mariah Carey's hit, "One Sweet Day," starting off with Jason Castro. He gets a nice solo, but I feel like he's phoning it in. Kristy Lee is totally singing through her nose, but man, is she workin' her outfit. She will totally pull a Pickler and take the country world by storm. The rest of the Idols do a nice job, but I kind of think picking a song about "shining down on me from heaven," must be so hard for David Cook to sing (considering his brother is so sick). But, he's pro, and sings with all his heart.

(Side note: Is Syesha's hair getting taller with every show? Is David A.'s getting spikier?)

We're shown highlights from last night before we get to the first round of eliminations. What the hell is going on here? Ryan asks Jason to start a group on his left and then David Cook has to start a group to the right. Carly is asked to join Jason. Oh, come on! Do we really have to play these games? This is why I didn't watch the results shows last year. Now we're going to a commercial break, and Elliott Yamin will sing when we return.

They just showed the world's shortest Ford commercial to "You've Got to Break Free." On that note, Elliott followed with a song called, "Free." He looked good, sounded great and Paula was rockin' out in her Solid Gold red sequined number. Awww, I miss Elliott! He flashed something on his hand that read, "We miss you, Mom." I guess she just passed away? Dear god, he just said it's the first time he's been on stage without his mom watching. I'm immediately choked up. Damn you, Idol!

Syesha is asked to join Jason and Carly. Brooke is asked to join David and Kristy after she told Ryan that she put everything she had into "Hero" last night. Now, the only one left is poor David "I look like I'm gonna puke any second," Archuleta.

Now Ryan is taking calls from the viewers.... Do I really have to dignify this part with a summary? No.

Mariah saunters out from backstage and begins singing, "Bye, Bye." Her whole microphone and stand is covered in rhinestones. B-ling! Could her dress be tighter or shorter? I'd love to see her in jeans and a sweater to see what she looks like with clothes on (clearly, I'm not a dude). The song is really not that catchy and I don't think it shows off her talent. You can hear her track with vocals on in the background. She did the same thing on SNL, and I don't get it! Now she's trying to belt it out and it sounds like crap. It's kind of whiney and squeaky and I hear some major sound issues goin on. After she finishes and Ryan creepily ogles her, Mariah gives a shout out to her album that's "in stores today." Gross. I take back what I said last night about becoming her fan. That was silly and shameless self-promotion from someone who doesn't need it. Boo.

Now we're back to the eliminations. David A. walks out and is declared safe and then Syesha is asked to swap with David Cook. OMG!!! In the worst scumbag, a--hole move of all times, Ryan asks poor Archie to choose which side is safe! I'm about to throw very large breakables at my TV. Why must they do this? I gain new respect and admiration for Archie for sitting his behind down on the ground and refusing to choose. Good for you! Ryan has to bring David C., Carly, and Jason over to him as the "safe" bunch. They sit with him in a show of solidarity. These producers are disgusting. Boo!

Sorry about that rant, but that peeved you too, right? Our bottom three are all ladies: Syesha, Brooke and Kristy Lee. Whoa - Syesha is safe? Hmmm. Interesting. Kristy Lee is finally going home tonight, and Brooke starts sobbing. For her last song, Kristy Lee sat next to Simon on the judges table making him look extremely uncomfortable. I actually felt uncomfortable until she got back on stage. She did a great job with her last song considering how emotional she must have been. See you in Nashville, Kristy Lee.


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