January 29, 2007: Day 6: 11 am — 12 pm
"I'm glad we can all finally put our cards on the table." Something tells me we haven't seen the half of it there, Gray. I must confess, I'm feeling a little bummed out as we approach lunchtime for Jack Bauer. (Seriously, he's been living on rice and pain for almost two years - can somebody get this guy a Fatburger?) Hour six went down almost entirely in favor of the bad guys: Walid took a near-fatal beating from terrorist sympathizers who didn't even have any real information; Karen Hayes tendered her resignation after that bastard Tom Lennox threatened to destroy her (and her husband's) career; Nadia (and CTU as a whole) fell victim to Lennox's no-holds-barred racial profiling; and, of course, Jack and his father are mere moments from being executed at the hands of baby brother Gray. I'm not actually sure which one's the younger Bauer brother, but after that masterful attempt at tears-in-the-face-of-pummeling, my gut says Graem's spent his entire life trying to fill Jack's shoes. You know, while also trying to avoid having his trachea crushed by a well-timed "you stole my
Frampton Comes Alive!" kick to the throat. Life in the Bauer household couldn't have been easy. (And while we're on the topic, was Mrs. Bauer some sort of circus dwarf? I can't figure out the height differential between the boys and their beanpole father - Phillip looks ready to take the Isle of Lilliput by storm, while Graem's a card-carrying member of the Lollipop Guild.) I'll admit, I did feel some small relief that Jack's dad seems to be working to protect his family (I guess Jack came by it honestly) rather than masterminding some evil plan for world domination. But then again, you can't trust anybody on this show, can you? Don't go breaking my heart, James Cromwell.
Let's talk for a moment about the newest face to join our happy little national disaster, one Mr. Chad Lowe. Jesse McKenna has officially left the building, folks. I didn't catch his name just yet, so for now I can only refer to Lennox's right-hand man as Weasel No. 2. (This political overthrow has been brought to you by Weasel & Son: glad-handing power mongers and using ill-gotten information to their own advantage since 1983.) But here's what excites me about the introduction of this character: Lennox can grandstand and plan nefarious schemes all he wants, but somebody's got to do the dirty work. And
that's the guy I want to watch. I haven't felt a "gonna love to hate this guy" emotion come on so strong since Samwise Gamgee first showed up at CTU in Day 5.
An amusing side note: as Chloe passed along Jack's instructions to the latest SUV full of fresh-faced CTU operatives, I typed the words, "Hi, soon-to-be-dead tactical team!" But I kinda thought they'd at least live to see another couple lines of dialogue. Apparently Jack and Papa Bauer aren't the only ones who completely underestimated Graem.
NOTE: Thanks to all my eagle-eyed posters for catching the spelling of "Graem" during the opening credits. (Do you think that means we're supposed to spell his nickname "Grae"?) I've trained my eyes to ignore any onscreen lettering except the ticking clock, after the "Special Guest Star Roger Cross" tip-off. Spoilers are evil!
