Back on November 14 2006 when we saw the future lives of the NipTuck characters I mostly praised the episode since it was such a pleasant change of pace What I wasnt thinking at the time was how unfortunate it would become as a viewer that we know exactly what will become of the characters So Julia got shot last week so what We know that she survives since she was in the future episode So Christian and Annie got in a car crash caused by paparazzi this week We knew immediately that theyd be OK since theyre also in that episode And now even after multiple knife stabs in his back by crazy Colleen at the very end even though blood was gushing out of his mouth Sean cant be dead he too was in that damn futuristic episode Of course one can argue that the episode-of-the-future couldve just been someones dream but it wasnt presented that way when it aired so I guess I have the right to bitch about it right Imagine how shocking and suspenseful that stabbing
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When Nip/Tuck’s Julia McNamara (Joely Richardson) woke up from her gunshot coma in a state of retrograde amnesia, I found myself thinking: Can I have some of what she’s having? There’s a lot about Tuesday night’s TV offerings I’d like to forget, from the musical mediocrity of American Idol’s disappointing opening night of actual competition to the bloody mess of Nip/Tuck’s season finale.Regarding Idol: I can’t imagine it will be all that hard to kick two male contestants on Thursday night’s results show. Honestly, I’d be hard-pressed to find two guys to keep.OK, that’s overstating things a bit. I could make a plausible case for five, maybe six of the guys. But only a precious few showed any actual star quality, or joy in performing: young charmer David Archuleta, who, as Ryan Seacrest noted, many of the viewing audience would probably like to adopt; Australian hottie Michael Johns, who just as many might prefer to marry; and dre...
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That ending was a real bang wasnt it Oh Julia If youre going to buy a gun for self-protection protect yourself by hiding it from others All Eden the skank needed to do was find that damn gun in Julias bedroom I knew that as soon as Julia told Eden that she figured everything out that Eden was the one who was the cause of her mysterious illness Eden wasnt going to react in a good way How about the timing of Julia receiving her follicle lab results that clearly included words like exposure to high dosages of mercury and contaminated foods at the exact same time that Eden was serving her yet another piece of fruitcake Bingo Julia Ill take it to my room Julias inner thought Ill send it to the lab in Virginia Olivia sure was an understanding lover earlier sending Julias hair sample to the lab even after Julia told her she was having an affair with Christian I was expecting a different reaction There was Olivia all happy and peppy and burst
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Im going to cut to the chase and say that this was one of my very least favorite episodes since the series began but that ending was one of the best ever Hows that for running the gamut Lets start with that ending Ding-dong the witch is dead Just when I thought I was happy to see Gina back because I thought she changed her wicked ways here she was being more sadly pathetic than ever So pathetic that I grimaced every time she was on screen after that scene when she paid the Gina-look-alike Ali Raymer to have sex with Christian while she watchedand then begged Christian to Kiss me Then when she morphed further into Alex Forrest and lied by manipulating Julia into thinking Christian could be HIV positive because she was having sex with him I cringed even more I wanted the bee-yotch to get punished for her craziness I was so glad to see Christian hand her the restraining order towards the very end How many of you were thinking or perhaps screaming No way He is
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After a four-week break it was nice to revisit the adventures of our favorite fantastically plastic duo Too bad we still dont know what Eden put in that dang fruitcake four weeks ago All we know is that it gives Julia spontaneous nosebleeds which just makes Christian pout about being deprived of sex with his best friends ex Speaking of Eden how lovely to have a completely Eden-free episode Sure the skank returns next week but it was pleasant to get through an entire hour without her Four characters returned that I enjoy Dawn Budge Rosie ODonnell Freddie Oliver Platt Aidan Bradley Cooper and after a long time away Gina Jessalyn Gilsig Ill get to Ginas return laterEver since we first met Freddie it was beyond apparent that he was gay Then when Freddie and Dawn started dating besides thinking Huh I was immediately reminded of Dana Carveys character on SNL Lyle The Effeminate Heterosexual So leave it to Dawn to budge it out of him after seeing
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