Based on Mordecai Richler's prize-winning comic novel, his last and, arguably, best, BARNEY'S VERSION is the warm, wise, and witty story of Barney Panofsky (Paul Giamatti), a seemingly ordinary man who lives an extraordinary life. A candid confessional, told (as its title implies) entirely from Barney's point of view, the film spans four decades and two continents, taking us through the many highs, and a few too many lows, of our hero's long and colorful life. The reason that Barney must tell his story now - or, at least his version of it - is that his sworn enemy has just published a tell-all book that dredges up the more compromising chapters of Barney's past: the many, often murky entrepreneurial schemes that lead to his success the three marriages, all of them terminated and, most problematically, the mysterious, as-yet-unsolved disappearance of Barneys best friend, Boogie, a possible murder for which Barney remains the prime suspect. Since his memory sometimes fails him, and because he has the unfortunate habit of getting blind drunk at pivotal moments, Barney leads us on this somewhat unsteady walk down memory lane, not only to explain his life to others, but also to explain it to himself.
Mostly, we learn about Barney by witnessing his three marriages, each representing, like the rings of a circus, different .acts. of his life. There is his first wife, Clara (Rachelle Lefevre), a flame-haired, flagrantly unfaithful free spirit with whom Barney briefly lives la vie de Boheme in Rome. Then, after returning home to Montreal, Barney marries the .Second Mrs. P.,. (Minnie Driver), a wealthy Jewish Princess who shops and talks incessantly, barely noticing that Barney is not listening. It is at their lavish wedding that Barney meets, and starts pursuing, Miriam (Rosamund Pike), the woman who will become his third wife, the mother of his two children, and the love of his life. Throughout their life together Barney is believed by many - including, 4 at times, himself - to have murdered Boogie (Scott Speedman), the friend whom he both adores and envies, who simply vanishes one day, along with Barneys youth.
In telling us, as he calls it, .the true story of my wasted life,. Barney is honest to a fault, owning up to every one of his flaws and failings with a self-lacerating wit that positively dares us not to like him. However, its impossible not to forgive someone as smart, funny, and self-aware as Barney. Not only does he turn out to be an unrepentant romantic man, as his lifelong devotion to Miriam attests, he is also capable of all kinds of sneaky acts of gallantry, generosity, and goodness when we and he least expect it. Far from .wasted,. his is a gloriously full life, played out on a grand scale. And, at the center of his story stands an unlikely, but unforgettable, hero--Barney Panofsky.
Rudi is frustrated, and 2bit thinks he has the perfect solution.
Rudi battles Machine Mommy for Apple's affection.
Meet Rudi Wilson, the crazy, irresponsible mother all mothers fear they are - barely keeping her kids alive through a series of bizarre improvised solutions to the endless challenges of parenting.
2Bit hopes a sophisticated sex robot is the cure for Rudi's loneliness.
Child Services keeps Apple in their care as they question Rudi’s abilities as a mother.
Oops...Rudi forgets the kids at school again. Dick and Apple see a whole new side of "after-school" care.
Rudi ups the ante at Apple’s sleepover after the kids say they’re not having fun.
When Harvard's star basketball player faces financial trouble, his life spirals out of control as he faces one risky proposition after another.
The story of the politically incorrect life of Barney Panofsky, who meets the love of his life at his wedding - and she is not the bride. A candid confessional, told from Barney's point of view, the film spans three decades and two continents, taking us through the different ?acts of his unusual history. There is his first wife, Clara, a flame-haired, flagrantly unfaithful free spirit with whom Barney briefly lives la vie de Boheme in Rome. The "Second Mrs. Panofsky" is a wealthy Jewish Princess who shops and talks incessantly, barely noticing that Barney is not listening. And it is at their lavish wedding that Barney meets, and starts pursuing, Miriam, his third wife, the mother of his two children, and his true love. With his father, Izzy as his sidekick, Barney takes us through the many highs, and a few too many lows, of his long and colorful life. Not only does Barney turn out to be a true romantic, he is also capable of all kinds of sneaky acts of gallantry, generosity, and goodness when we – and he least expect it. His is a gloriously full life, played out on a grand scale. And, at its center stands an unlikely hero – the unforgettable Barney Panofsky.
The story of the politically incorrect life of Barney Panofsky (Paul Giamatti)-a candid confessional, told from Barney?s point of view, the film spans three decades and two continents, taking us through the different ?acts of his unusual history
The story of the politically incorrect life of Barney Panofsky (Paul Giamatti), who meets the love of his life at his wedding - and she is not the bride. A candid confessional, told from Barney's point of view, the film spans three decades and two continents, taking us through the different acts of his unusual history.
Havard's star basketball player, Alan, is pushing his luck. He must hide one girlfriend, Cindy, the daughter of a mob boss, from his other girlfriend, Chesney, his promiscuous Philosophy professor. Alan's escapades finally catch up with him when his family faces dire financial difficulty. To remedy the situation, Alan asks Cindy to approach her mobster father for a loan. He offers the money on one condition: throw the next game. While Alan contemplates the idea, he must juggle two girlfriends, deal with the mob, and face the FBI.
Harvard's star basketball player asks his girlfriend to approach her father for a loan to help his family. Her father consents with one condition: throw the next game.
While researching "urban legends" in her American folklore class, a Pendleton University co-ed witnesses the brutal murder of a classmate. As the body count rises, she realizes that someone is stalking and killing her friends to recreate various urban legends.
When New England college student Natalie finds herself at the center of a series of sadistic murders seemingly inspired by urban legends, she resolves to find the truth about Pendleton's own legend, a twenty-five-year-old story of a student massacre at the hands of an Abnormal Psych professor. As the fraternities prepare to celebrate the macabre anniversary, Natalie discovers that she is the focus of the crazed killer's intentions in the ultimate urban legend-- the story of her own horrific murder.
When her ex, Jeffrey, arrives with divorce papers in hand, Rudi smells a rat. She discovers that he’s trying to marry an elderly heiress – who not only wants Rudi’s husband, but her kids as well. The battle is on.
Struck by lightning, Apple becomes a miracle child complete with healing powers and followers, which Rudi embraces for all its perks. When Apple’s faithful become overwhelming, Rudi must searches for a way to disperse them.
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During her attempt to quit smoking, Rudi invites a group of NYC hipsters to her house to “immerse” themselves in suburbia – while she immerses herself in their second-hand smoke. Dick brings home a new-age class pet and struggles to keep him alive.
Taking over Apple’s school play, Rudi replaces the cast and crew – including Apple. But when Apple and the other kids lose it, Rudi realizes she may have gone too far. Joel develops a crush on Rudi with a disastrous outcome.
To avoid concerns that she’s on the prowl, Rudi invents a fake boyfriend. 2Bit provides Rudi with the newest in erotic technology, a Sexbot, that turns out to be more than she bargained for. Meanwhile, sparks fly between Dick and his new tutor Agnes Chu.
Threatened with exclusion from Apple’s sleepover circuit, Rudi hosts one of her own, but it quickly spins out of control when the nanny she hires kidnaps the kids. Meanwhile, Dick has a video game session that scares the crap out of him.
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Rudi hires an undocumented worker to tame her unruly garden. She marries gardener Salvador to prevent his possible deportation and Greg ends up deported. Bullied by Travis, Dick becomes a power-crazy, sugar-addicted Lemonade King who hits rock bottom.
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Challenged with criticism of her inferior parenting, Rudi starts Apple on performance enhancing drugs that result in the best kid ever, until she goes off the rails. Dick and his chicken manage to win the school's science prize without any enhancement.
Zoey gives up hope that she'll ever see Mike again and tells Mal the jig is up.
The Final Four hunt for Pirate Booty and a spot in the Grand Finale in a challenge that becomes truly life-threatening.
The final five All-Stars race to the most dangerous regions of the island to find ingredients for the ultimate sundae.
The All-Stars face the Boot Camp from Hell as they struggle to survive the harshest obstacle course ever.
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