The Housewife:Gabrielle aka Gaby (Eva Longoria Parker)The Household:• Ex-husband Carlos (Ricardo Antonio Chavira) — currently blind and broke after the disastrous tornado and the almost equally disastrous affair he was having with Gaby behind everyone's back.• Mayor and dead husband Victor (John Slattery) — killed when hit with flying debris during the tornado (ironically for this show, the debris was a dangerously sharp edge of a white picket fence).Her Desperate Situation:Gaby was cheating on her formerly alive husband with her still-alive but now-blind ex-husband. Trouble is, she's unaware that Carlos' loss of sight isn't temporary — it's permanent. Oh, and Victor left her nothing in his will. Victor's wealthy father Milton (Mike Farrell) called Gaby a "cheating, lying whore" at the funeral and told her she was getting zilch. Gaby quietly stormed out of that church as if she was walking the catwalk. Adding to her desperation is that little issue of losing...
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Felicity Huffman as Lynette by Danny Feld/ABC
The Housewife:Lynette (Felicity Huffman)The Household:• Husband Tom (Doug Savant) — pizza-parlor owner with a bad back, allergies and a jealousy streak; presently very happy to be alive.• Son Parker (Zane Huett) — the least bratty brat who misses Ida Greenberg (Pat Crawford Brown), but now adores his babysitter Mrs. McCluskey (Kathryn Joosten), even though she can still be a Crabby Spice.• Twin sons Preston and Porter (Brent and Shane Kinsman) — brat squared.• Daughter Penny (Kirsten and Darien Pinkerton) — youngest Scavo brat who rarely says anything.• Illegitimate Kayla (Rachel Fox) — Tom's bratty daughter from a previous relationship who's still trying to adjust to life without her late mother.Her Desperate Situation:Most of Lynette's desperation is seemingly over since she is now cancer-free and her hubby and all five of their children survived being trapped underground beneath late neighbor Ida's tornado-demolished house. Ida sa...
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Teri Hatcher as Susan by Danny Feld/ABC
The Housewife:Susan (Teri Hatcher)The Household:• Husband Mike (James Denton) — a plumber addicted to pain pills, currently in rehab, has a hot temper and a father who's in jail for murder.• Daughter Julie (Andrea Bowen) — unlucky in love, frequently embarrassed by her mother, wishes Susan was more like Bree (Marcia Cross).Her Desperate Situation:Susan desperately used "tough love" on Mike by forcing him into rehab. Meanwhile, out of desperation to maintain the fabulous home-cooking and meticulous laundry services of Bree, mama-to-be Susan plotted to spoil any attempts by Bree to find a new home by scaring away Walter (J.C. MacKenzie), the potential contractor. Susan often gets herself into pratfalls, sometimes so much that some viewers are desperate to change the channel.What We Know Will Happen (Possible Spoiler Alert):Susan continues to help Mike struggle post-rehab while simultaneously continuing to house Bree, Orson (Kyle MacLachlan) and family. Mike visits ...
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Marcia Cross as Bree by Ron Tom/ABC
The Housewife: Bree (Marcia Cross)The Household:• Husband Orson (Kyle MacLachlan) — a dentist still hiding a mysterious past who wrote a prescription for pain pills for Mike (James Denton). Bree knows just about everything about Orson's past, but there are still some holes to fill.• Son Andrew (Shawn Pyfrom) — young, single and gay, but wishes his mama would stop playing matchmaker and making him dress up as Cher.• Daughter Danielle (Joy Lauren) — away at college. In her quest to raise Danielle's baby as her own, Bree gave Danielle tuition to a "party school." Bribery much? Danielle took Bree up on her offer pronto.• Baby "son" Benjamin, who's actually Bree's grandson.Her Desperate Situation:Bree lost her Martha Stewart-esque house in the devastating tornado, so she and most of her family are staying with Susan (Teri Hatcher) and Julie (Andrea Bowen), much to the delight of Susan and Julie, who love Bree's exquisite housekeeping and cooking skills....
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Back on November 14 2006 when we saw the future lives of the NipTuck characters I mostly praised the episode since it was such a pleasant change of pace What I wasnt thinking at the time was how unfortunate it would become as a viewer that we know exactly what will become of the characters So Julia got shot last week so what We know that she survives since she was in the future episode So Christian and Annie got in a car crash caused by paparazzi this week We knew immediately that theyd be OK since theyre also in that episode And now even after multiple knife stabs in his back by crazy Colleen at the very end even though blood was gushing out of his mouth Sean cant be dead he too was in that damn futuristic episode Of course one can argue that the episode-of-the-future couldve just been someones dream but it wasnt presented that way when it aired so I guess I have the right to bitch about it right Imagine how shocking and suspenseful that stabbing
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That ending was a real bang wasnt it Oh Julia If youre going to buy a gun for self-protection protect yourself by hiding it from others All Eden the skank needed to do was find that damn gun in Julias bedroom I knew that as soon as Julia told Eden that she figured everything out that Eden was the one who was the cause of her mysterious illness Eden wasnt going to react in a good way How about the timing of Julia receiving her follicle lab results that clearly included words like exposure to high dosages of mercury and contaminated foods at the exact same time that Eden was serving her yet another piece of fruitcake Bingo Julia Ill take it to my room Julias inner thought Ill send it to the lab in Virginia Olivia sure was an understanding lover earlier sending Julias hair sample to the lab even after Julia told her she was having an affair with Christian I was expecting a different reaction There was Olivia all happy and peppy and burst
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As Ive been quite verbal about in the past I was a huge Knots Landing fan So after reading about this episode and then seeing the coming attractions last week I was needless to say excited I mean how could I not be Donna Mills was portraying a rich Beverly Hills socialite named Lulu Grandiron and she and her friends married wealthy high-powered execs divorced them and then took all their money And adding to a true Knots fans delight one of those friends Annette was played by Joan Van Ark All they needed was Michele Lee and it wouldve been more of a complete set But Im thinking that Michele was asked but declined since the four rich women were all plastic surgery fanatics and maybe Michele didnt want to admit shes had work done Those two other roles were filled by women who co-starred on other prime-time soaps in the 80s Shari Belafonte shes dropped the Harper from Hotel played Catherine in the really bad wig and Deborah Shelton from Dallas was Marla wi
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After talkin smack about last weeks episode Im happy to say I enjoyed this one more I wouldnt place it in the fabulous file but it sure was better than a week ago I specifically liked the macabre feel especially in my favorite scene the way Colleen Sharon Gless killed CAA talent agent Bob Levitz Todd Cahoon Ill get to that later I want to start with how differently I felt about the Colleen character this week compared to last Now that we realize she really isnt the power agent she was claiming to be that shes an unknown low-life crazy stalker pretending to be a Hollywood power player suddenly I like her Last week it bothered me when she asked Sean to touch her boobs I felt no strong female agent would be caught dead doing that Color me na239ve I totally fell for her act I shouldve picked up the clue phone when Sean dropped Colleen off in front of her fancy house drove away and then Colleen turned around and kept walking Na239ve moi thought she
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Im going to cut to the chase and say that this was one of my very least favorite episodes since the series began but that ending was one of the best ever Hows that for running the gamut Lets start with that ending Ding-dong the witch is dead Just when I thought I was happy to see Gina back because I thought she changed her wicked ways here she was being more sadly pathetic than ever So pathetic that I grimaced every time she was on screen after that scene when she paid the Gina-look-alike Ali Raymer to have sex with Christian while she watchedand then begged Christian to Kiss me Then when she morphed further into Alex Forrest and lied by manipulating Julia into thinking Christian could be HIV positive because she was having sex with him I cringed even more I wanted the bee-yotch to get punished for her craziness I was so glad to see Christian hand her the restraining order towards the very end How many of you were thinking or perhaps screaming No way He is
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After a four-week break it was nice to revisit the adventures of our favorite fantastically plastic duo Too bad we still dont know what Eden put in that dang fruitcake four weeks ago All we know is that it gives Julia spontaneous nosebleeds which just makes Christian pout about being deprived of sex with his best friends ex Speaking of Eden how lovely to have a completely Eden-free episode Sure the skank returns next week but it was pleasant to get through an entire hour without her Four characters returned that I enjoy Dawn Budge Rosie ODonnell Freddie Oliver Platt Aidan Bradley Cooper and after a long time away Gina Jessalyn Gilsig Ill get to Ginas return laterEver since we first met Freddie it was beyond apparent that he was gay Then when Freddie and Dawn started dating besides thinking Huh I was immediately reminded of Dana Carveys character on SNL Lyle The Effeminate Heterosexual So leave it to Dawn to budge it out of him after seeing
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