While many assumed Donald Glover was leaving Community to focus on his rap career and upcoming FX series, the actor revealed the reasons are much more personal.
"I didn't leave Community to rap. I don't wanna rap. I wanted to be on my own," Glover wrote in one of many handwritten messages posted to Instagram Sunday night. "I've been sick this year. I've seen a bunch of people die this year. This is my first time I've felt helpless. But I'm not on that. Kept looking for something to be in with. Follow someone's blueprint. But you have to be on your own."
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In addition to touching upon his career, Glover, who's been fairly absent in social media the past few months, shared a surprisingly personal and troubling list of fears and insecurities. "I feel like I'm letting everyone down. I'm afraid people hate who I really am. I'm afraid I hate who I really am. I'm scared people will find out what I masturbate to. I'm afraid I'm here for nothing. I feel that this will feel pretentious," Glover continued.
"I'm afraid this is all an accident. I'm scared I'll be Tyrese. I'm afraid Dan Harmon hates me. I'm scared I won't know anything ever again. I'm scared I never knew anything. I'm afraid I'll regret this. I'm afraid this doesn't matter at all," the actor shared in another message.
As of now, Glover is set to appear in five of Community's 13-episode fifth season. If the cult comedy is renewed, he won't return for Season 6. Glover is also set to develop and star in a music-themed comedy for FX tentatively titled Atlanta.
According to Instagram, Glover had hoped to release his latest album in December, but the label is resistant because "it's not a holiday album and he's not a big artist."