Spartacus Episode 7: Things That Made Us Go "Ew!"
Craig Parker, Viva Bianca, Hannah Mangan Lawrence
On Friday's Spartacus: Vengeance, we find more reasons to really hate Glaber, which means that his eventual comeuppance will be sweet... and bloody!
The praetor has begun a reign of terror that mandates that any person who's thought to be a Spartacus sympathizer will be crucified, literally. He later invites Gannicus to help lead his men to victory against the rebels. Miserable with their lives under Glaber's rule, Lucretia thinks up a scheme to get Ilithiya out of town and then makes her own offer to Gannicus: She'll arrange it so certain guards are called away, making it easy for him to kill Glaber, which will end the crucifixions. Being Gannicus, he instead slaughters the caravan bringing Ilithiya to Rome and leaves behind his rudis, a rejection of the so-called freedom they had granted him.
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Meanwhile, the rebels have successfully freed a ship full of slaves who then join their ranks. Crixus isn't thrilled since they're all Germanic like Agron. He's even less thrilled when the biggest one, Sedullus, tries to force himself on Naevia. As a result, Spartacus' men and the new recruits engage in an all-out battle royal that ends only when Spartacus kills Sedullus. This apparently earns the respect of the new guys, who then pledge themselves to his cause.
Enough story, on to the whore-y and gory!
The Bodies - Although we don't actually see any bumping and grinding, Ashur's continued rape of Lucretia reaches skeevy new heights now that he's playing mind games: He makes her call him "dominus" and wear the red wig that her late husband always liked on her. Sick and wrong! Later, Glaber and Seppia getting it on isn't anything gross physically, but psychologically, we're disturbed since he's the one who gleefully murdered her dear brother Seppius. Just wait until she finds out! We have a feeling her wrath will be especially fun to watch.
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The Blood - Let's count down to the worst (or is it the best?) "Ew!" death:
5. The fight belowdecks in the slave ship has plenty of bloody moments, but the standout is the guard's slow-mo fall, which allows us plenty of time to see inside his slashed and spurting neck.
4. Wow, was it a year ago that we watched the Gods of the Arena finale? Thanks for the flashback of Gannicus' insanely horrifying, jaw-breaking victory.
3. Husband of the Year Glaber begins the crucifixions by making an example of Ilithiya's body slave. Seeing the spikes getting hammered into her flesh and hearing her cries is both heartbreaking and painful.
2. Gannicus' caravan butchery is just that: butchery. Titus Andronicus and Sweeney Todd's Ms. Lovett would have their pick of limbs, torsos and plenty of entrails for pies.
1. Spartacus' face-off (ha!) with Sedullus is a blur until the end when he slices off the German's face, making him into kind of a revolting reverse TeleTubby. And just when we think we're done, the camera snaps back to that red-meat mask ringed by hair and skin... and the brain slides out of the cavity and plops to the ground.
Which scene unnerved you the most? How did you react to Sedullus' death?