Bruce Greenwood

So that was weird.

Last night, things on The River went from scary to schizo as the crew of Magus uncovered footage of looked to be Emmet's final hours. Turns out he was being hit on by Katie Featherston from Paranormal Activity and terrorized by a jungle demon with a penchant for skinning folks alive — holy shades of the Lost pilot's pilot! — while slowly losing his marbles and gaining the supernatural skill to create fire in his own hands. Thankfully, our starving hero was also able to stave off the burning desire to kill the team's canine mascot for food, because otherwise, we'd be in a huge fight and potentially miss what happens next.

And a lot needs to happen, seeing how the finale is only two weeks away (no word on a renewal yet, but those ratings ain't peppy, y'all). Granted, last night's hour filled in a few huge blanks, but there's the matter of that mark on Lena's neck, the mystery surrounding the now-abandoned medical facility, and the fact that, even if they do find Emmet, he's probably gonna be some crazy-eyed nutso in smart Banana Republic ensemble. How is it all gonna end? Good question. Although a better one might be "are you watching and if so, what do you think of the show so far?"

Share your opinions below... and appease the all-powerful Il tunchi!

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