Jesse James has a "huge hole" in his heart, but understands Sandra Bullock's decision to file for divorce and adopt a baby without him, he tells People.
Sandra Bullock files for divorce; adopts baby boy
"The decision to let my wife end our marriage, and continue the adoption of Louis on her own, has been the hardest. The love I have for Louis cannot be put to words. Not having him around to love and to hold has left a huge hole in my heart," James said.
Bullock, 45, told the magazine that she and James, 45, began the adoption process four years ago and brought Louis home in January, but they opted to keep their new addition a secret until after the Oscars. The actress says she is finalizing the adoption as a single parent and has filed for a divorce.
James also added that he is focusing an overcoming the "addiction" that led to his divorce, without specifying what the addiction is. Several women, including tattoo model Michelle "Bombshell" McGee, have claimed to have had affairs with him.
Michelle "Bombshell" McGee apologizes to Sandra Bullock
"Sandy is the love of my life, but considering the pain and devastation I have caused her, it would be selfish to not let her go. Right now it is time for me to beat this addiction that has taken two of the things I love the most in life," he said.
The Monster Garage star, who publically apologized to Bullock and his three kids for his "poor judgment," recently returned home from a treatment facility where he was dealing with what he called "personal issues," according to People.
"I have always taken great pride in proving people wrong. That time has come once again to show that I am not what everyone says I am. I know in my heart that I can be the best father possible to my four children, and the mate Sandy deserves, and realize that this is an incredible mountain to climb. But I believe that the steps I have taken in the last 30 days are the foundation for making this happen. The lifelong commitment I am making is what being a real husband and father is all about.
Jesse James apologizes to Sandra Bullock: "I deserve everything bad coming my way"
"I ask that you please do not judge Sandy for the things I have done. She has done no wrong. She played no part in any of this. She has been an amazing wife, mother, and best friend, for the over six years we have been together."