Fox's new dating show Take Me Out is an hour of pure, unadulterated kitschy-ness.
At the top of the show, host George Lopez descends to the stage on the "Love Lift" (a neon tube resembling that of a drive-through bank teller) and flashes his corny, toothy grin. And that's just the beginning.
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The show, premiering Thursday at 8/7c, takes 30 women — dubbed "the flirty 30" — and attempts to match them with their perfect mate. The concept: Each woman stands behind a Jeopardy-style illuminated podium. If they're interested in the bachelor before them, they leave their podium light on. But for those women not interested, repeats his signature line, "If you're not turned on... TURN OFF!"
When you watch the show, you'll probably find yourself thinking, "Where in the hell did they find these people?" Between Lopez, the slimy bachelors, and the women (complete with tacky satin cocktail dresses and corny lines), it often feels like a hilarious Saturday Night Live spoof of a Miss USA pageant. But it's real-ish!
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We're officially dubbing Take Me Out the cheesiest show of the summer, but we're totally going to watch it anyway. Want to see what we're talking about? Here are our top 10 corny one-liners from the premiere.
1. "Let's turn the thermostat up to HOT... bring out the girls!" -- Lopez
2. "You know George? I think my perfect guy would be like a sports car. Beauty and class on the outside, with high performance on the inside." — Lisa, contestant
3. "Let the hot dog see the buns! Single man... reveal yourself!" — Lopez
4. "If he's not Mr. Right... turn out your light!" — Lopez
5. "Will it be lust, or will it be bust?" — Lopez
6. "He's a nice piece of meat... rare, juicy and ready to have a bite taken out of him!" — Katie Ann, contestant
7. "John, how many of our little lionesses will still think that you're king of the jungle after Round 2?" — Lopez
8. "I'm a DVD — compact, and full of action baby." — Eric, bachelor
9. "I think he's pretty petite, but you know what they say: Good things come in small packages!" — Lisa, contestant
10. "Girls if you're feelin nothin'... get on that button!" — Lopez
Take Me Out premieres Thursday, June 7 at 8/7c on Fox.