Today's News: Our Take


STARS MOURN CASH

Johnny Cash's funeral takes place today, in the same Tennessee church where he mourned his wife, June Carter Cash, back in May. Among the music stars expected to be in attendance: Kris Kristofferson, who'll sing and speak about Cash. Sheryl Crow and Emmylou Harris will also sing at the private service. A public memorial is being planned for a later date. read more

EMMY FEVER

Gene Wilder and Christina Applegate picked up Emmys over the weekend for their respective guest turns last season on Will & Grace and Friends. Other winners at Saturday's 2002-03 Creative Arts Emmys included Charles S. Dutton (guest actor for Without a Trace), Alfre Woodard (guest actress for The Practice) and The Simpsons (animated program). The 55th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards (read: the real ceremony) airs live on Fox Sunday, beginning at 8 pm/ET. read more

SPRINGTIME FOR SHEEN

Charlie Sheen and wife Denise Richards expect their first baby this spring, according to Entertainment Tonight. Sheen — who co-stars in CBS's fall sitcom Two And A Half Men — already has one daughter, 18-year-old college freshman Cassandra, from a previous relationship. read more

DOWN TO BUSINESS

Reality guru Mark Burnett is slated to begin production today on The Apprentice, a New York-based reality series that is being described as Survivor set in the business world. The show — which stars Donald Trump — is slated to debut in February on NBC. read more

RECALL DRAMA

It looks like the circus will be in town for a few more months, folks. A federal appeals court ruled Monday that the California recall election — starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Gary Coleman and porn actress Mary Carey — cannot proceed as scheduled on Oct. 14 because some votes would be cast using outdated punch-card ballot machines. The ruling could delay the election until March 2. God help us all. read more

MOVE OVER HOMER...

Fox is developing a half-hour animated comedy for Fall 2004 that's described as a 21st century take on All in the Family. According to Variety, American Dad — from Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane — focuses on a clan consisting of a right-wing CIA agent and his wife, their two kids, a housebound alien named Roger and a French-speaking goldfish. read more

STYLE ON A BUDGET

Clutch the (faux) pearls! Carson Kressley and his Queer Eye for the Straight Guy posse may be famous, but they ain't rich. According to TheSmokingGun.com, the Fab Five are only being paid $3,000 apiece per episode this year. What's more, the quartet are locked into six consecutive one-year renewal options, allowing for annual pay raises of just five percent. By the way, their perk-free deal dictates that whenever they travel, they must fly (horrors!) coach. read more

AND THEY SAID IT WOULDN'T LAST...

Alright, now it's safe to start collecting on that office pool. Anonymous sources are telling People magazine that Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck have split — although it's not clear if the break-up is permanent. People says Affleck dumped Lopez due to "second thoughts" about their impending wedding. Rumor has it Lopez's alleged request for a prenup may have contributed to Affleck's change of heart. Whatever the reason, J.Lo seems to be handling the estrangement like a woman who's been through this three times before. The New York tabs are running snapshots of the singer-actress frolicking in the Miami surf over the weekend. Affleck, meanwhile, was spotted gambling and sunning himself in Las Vegas. And me? I'm $20 richer. read more

Sunday Sex and the City Do you...

Sunday

Sex and the City
Do you know I lived in New York for 13 years and never once saw a woman walking down the street in a tutu? Not even near Lincoln Center. There... I got that off my chest. And I never want to see Carrie and crew happy, because with their pathological self-absorption and infuriating sense of entitlement they don't deserve to be. There... that, too. Except maybe Miranda. I kind of like her because she's the only likable one in the bunch, especially grading on a bell curve. But the beauty of New York City is that it's big enough to enjoy without ever having to get anywhere near women like them. The town deserves a better fate than having even one viewer think you can't. Baryshnikov deserves a more worthy gal. And we absolutely deserved a more satisfying wrap-up to the Miranda-Steve-Dr. Leeds entanglement than the five-second voice-over summation we got.

Conan O'Brien: Tenth Anniversary Special
Ho read more

BOOM BREAK

Production on NBC's Boomtown is shutting down for two weeks so producers can redo Episodes Six and Seven, Variety reports. The installments had originally been designed as a two-part arc, but NBC allegedly asked producers to make them stand-alone episodes instead. Says exec producer Graham Yost: "A determination was made that, given the level of sampling that goes on in the fall, it was maybe better if all our [early] episodes were stand-alone... in case people didn't see the episode from a week before." read more

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