Dancing with the Stars Episode Recap: Monday, Nov. 24, 2008
Well, folks, I made it to the Dancing with the Stars finals with my sanity relatively intact. Thanks to all of you for making my introduction to ballroom relatively painless, and, dare I say, relatively fun. Monday's performance show will include recaps of the contestants' favorite dances, something The Berge calls a "samba smackdown" (God help me) and the much-vaunted freestyle dance, which I hope includes Mission: Impossible-style wirework and something scary like Mummenschanz's clay faces. Lance, Brooke and Warren each have their strong points, to be sure, but in my estimation, Brooke seems to have the edge at the moment if for no other reason that she has been overwhelmingly consistent throughout the season. (We won't mention last week's unpleasantness.) Is it bad, therefore, that I am secretly (OK, not so secretly) hoping for an upset of gigantic proportions? Barring that, just seeing Cloris Leachman again will probably sustain me until the next season starts in March 2009. Are you ready? Read on to see who shone in Monday's proceedings.
Louis Says: "I really think that the last three standing deserve to be there, and worked for it. Nobody got there just because of an existing fan base or just on personality. Maybe Brooke will win, but I think with the improvement that Lance went through and how Warren has learned to work with his body, all three deserve to win, and that's not just me being diplomatic."
BROOKE BURKE and Derek Hough
Brooke and Derek chose to show us their quick-step again. It's very smooth and polished, and I'm sure they're doing it right, but that step in particular looks a little too "hoppy" for my taste. But Brooke looks beautiful and Derek is, as usual, an enthusiastic partner. Their paso doble, on the other hand, holds up for me. They both really acted the part, and I still like this choice of classical music, although I still have no idea what it's called. Brooke's insanely voluminous skirt goes a long way to conveying the dance's drama, as she could have an entire village's worth of field mice under there and we'd never know.
LANCE BASS and Lacey Schwimmer
L&L show us their tango again, which I remember as their "goth dolls come alive" routine. It's very impressionistic and quick, and I like the demented story they're trying to tell. Their mambo is one that I remember mostly for the fun music and Lacey's "pooping fabric" dress. The high-energy routine is really fun though, and the "lyrics" to the song ("7/lips/5/fingers") are just weird enough to make me pay attention. I particularly liked Lacey's cool freeze-frame back bend and their crazed series of over-the-head arm swings, which really worked rhythmically with the song.
WARREN SAPP and Kym Johnson
I love this couple; they really appear to like each other, and it shows. Warren and Kym first show us their Viennese waltz, which stands out in my mind because Warren's suit is pink and wine, which is a color combination that makes me gag, but also because once the music slows down a bit, it's easy to see how smooth Warren is on his feet. It's a great dance. Their paso doble makes me giggle to see their sparkly, Matrix-inspired, full-length pleather coats again. I actually think all that fabric might have gotten in their way a bit. They do some nice spins at the end, but then there's that awkward final moment where Warren didn't quite do what he was supposed to with his coattails. Very distracting.
Warren promises "a whole lot of something you've never seen before" tonight. I can't wait.
This season's junior champions, Craig and Samantha (brother and sister? I can't remember), dance the jive for us, and they're certainly competent. I'm ordering flat-screens, Adidas track suits and cupcakes off Amazon.com for them as we speak, but I still think kid dancers are creepy.
Filler. Trash talk before the samba smackdown and the freestyle dancers. "Don't look away. Anything can happen," says Len. From your lips to the ballroom gods' ears, big guy.
Now the finalists walk down the stairs, and it's like the whole show is starting over again. What's happening? Did my TiVo just hiccup? What's going on here? I'm disoriented. Mommy?
Len says the judges think the best three couples have advanced to the finals, and I agree. And we're on to the samba smackdown! Whatever that is!
Uh-oh, Brooke can't remember her steps. Lance is worried because the samba isn't his strongest dance. Warren got the worst scores in the samba. This could be delicious. Smack talk flies at the group rehearsal, and the couples hold back on showing their moves, lest they tip off the competition. All right, dance already! Jeez!
I think it was very resourceful — and ecologically minded — of Samantha to craft her hairpiece by shaving down the pet Sasquatch that she keeps in the solarium at home. There is so much hair on her head I am surprised she isn't wearing a Bedazzled brace to keep that slender neck aloft.
If this routine doesn't work out, I will definitely blame it on the boogie. There, I said it. Brooke and Derek do a very competent solo, but it doesn't seem very samba-y to me. Lance and Lacey are similarly enthusiastic, and, it must be said, decidedly more Latin in flavor. Warren and Kym tear it up. The group portion is fun. I was worried when they assumed the "ring around the rosey" position, but it quickly morphed into a group lift that was very cool-looking. I give the round to Lance and Lacey since their choreography was overall more interesting and appeared to have a higher degree of difficulty.
Louis Says: "Brooke made up for last week's screw-up. She got the best scores because she had the best dance. I think that Lacey went overboard with herself, putting Lance again in the back seat. Warren now had a more recognizable samba. From the dancing point of view, he was still the worst of the three, but he was the most entertaining."
What up, Jamie Lynn Sigler?
Len thinks they all did a better samba than during the season. Bruno gives them the same criticisms that he has given them all season. Carrie Ann says Lance is the one to beat, Warren is the most improved, and Brooke is the best at technical nuance.
Brooke and Derek earn 28 points.
Lance and Lacey earn 26 points.
Warren and Kym earn 25 points.
And now! The freestyle round!
BROOKE BURKE and Derek Hough
Brooke and Derek are planning a lot of crazy lifts and at least one pervy combination somersault. Since Derek's back is hurting, they practice their lifts in a pool, which looks pretty messy actually.
They've (very wisely, I think) chosen to dance to "You're the One That I Want" from Grease, sending many a post-teen heart aflutter with memories of their own sexual development as it was aided by John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John. The dance is kicky and flirty, and includes some pretty athletic lifts, jumps, at least one shoulder ride and that creepy somersault, which actually doesn't look that bad. They have a nifty costume reveal for Brooke about halfway through, revealing really slutty stuff underneath. Way to play to your audience, lady.
Bruno says "follow that — you are the one that we all want." He says they ended up in positions he's only see in the Kama Sutra. (Um, ew.) Carrie Ann says they brought it. Len got "all hot under the collar." Both Bruno and Len say it's the best freestyle they've ever seen. They get a perfect 30, and I'm nervous that that means that this competition is essentially over.
Louis Says: "At first, I thought the Grease song was a little cheesy, and I was remembering what Tony and Stacy did in Season 2 with Saturday Night Fever, but maybe only for about 10 seconds. Then I thought, 'Wow.' They pulled out some great lifts. They made something really creative from something really cheesy. Great job. One of the best freestyles the show has ever had."
LANCE BASS and Lacey Schwimmer
I'm guessing from their costumes that they're dancing to Run-DMC — let's see if I'm right. Lance says he's ready to take that trophy home, so they've chosen hip-hop. I'm concerned.
Aha! "It's Tricky" by Run-DMC. (Never doubt me.) I like their dance. It's a nice change of pace from all the Viennese blah-blah-blah, but, I have to say, I think technically the choreography is lacking. I can already hear the judges saying that this isn't So You Think You Can Dance. They end with a funny nod to last week's show mishap, but I. Am. Very. Concerned.
Carrie Ann thinks there was a section that didn't work for her. Len sings a few bars of "It's Tricky," which warms the cockles of my cold, black heart. He actually liked it! I'm very surprised. Bruno says a bunch of stuff, and ends with "very good." They earn a solid 27, which I think is generous. And I'm a fan.
Louis Says: "I was disappointed in their freestyle. They said they weren't going to do any lifts, but to not do anything but hip-hop... It was very good, but Lance didn't take the risks that Brooke and Warren did."
WARREN SAPP and Kym Johnson
Warren is excited for the freestyle round because his little girl told him that it's when he gets to "swing [Kym] around and lift [her up]." Aw. Kym acknowledges that they're going into the freestyle as the underdog couple.
They dance to Ike and Tina Turner's "Proud Mary," which is hot. I see silvery stuff peeking out from under their red and black outfits, which makes me think there's another costume reveal in store for us. My first observation is that the beginning part of the routine is nice and deliberate, but maybe too slow. It really explodes into life once they take their clothes off. Kym's costume is shedding like a silver-plated English sheepdog. Their lifts are fun, but overall I think their effort is kind of ordinary — even with "Proud Mary" on their side.
Len says Warren is an absolute star, and that this show isn't just about dancing, it's about entertainment, and that nobody can touch him in that department. Bruno says "resistance is futile; lay back and enjoy the ride." Carrie Ann says it was her favorite freestyle, which means she is clearly in the tank for Warren. But her inner bitch rears its well-coiffed head to point out that she noticed a mistake. Ugh. They earn a 28, including a 10 from Len, which really shocks me. The Berge locates a tiny piece of silvery detritus and observes that "on Edyta, this is a whole costume." Oh, Berge!
Louis Says: "You can see that he's the worst dancer technically, but he can move. I think that Warren is going to win this thing. Carrie Ann saying that he was the most improved, that will get him even more votes. He was pushing the envelope; his competitive side is coming out more."
To recap, the leaderboard:
Brooke and Derek earned 58.
Lance and Lacey earned 53.
Warren and Kym also earned 53.
So who do you think will take home that tackier-than-the-corkboard-over-my-desk mirrorball trophy? More than any other week this season, I think Brooke and Derek really stood out both technically and entertainment-wise, but I know there are those of you out there who will surely disagree. Let your voices be heard one last time in the comments section below!
Louis Says: "There is real excitement this year. Last year everyone knew that Kristi [Yamaguchi] was going to win. It's not like that this year. A compliment to the judges this season: Sometimes I hear their critiques and I'm pulling my hair out. I think this season it looks like they are wearing different glasses. They are seeing things more accurately."
Watch clips and full episodes of Dancing with the Stars in our Online Video Guide
